有关英语的小笑话精选

2017-03-08

前苏联著名作家高尔基说过,“哪里有人,哪里就有笑声。”从古到今,笑话是人们生活中不可缺少的“调剂品”。下面是小编带来的有关英语的小笑话,欢迎阅读!

有关英语的小笑话篇一

Whose Son Is the Greatest

the mothers of four priests got together and were discussing their sons. "my son is a monsignor," said the first proud woman. "when he enters a room, people say, 'hello, monsignor'."

the second mother went on, "my son is a bishop. when he enters a room, people say, 'hello, your excellency'."

"my son is a cardinal." continued the next one. "when he enters a room, people say, 'hello, your eminence'.

" the fourth mother thought for a moment. "my son is six-foot-ten and weighs 300 pounds, " she said. "when he enters a room, people say, 'oh, my god'!"

谁的儿子最伟大

四位牧师的母亲聚到一起谈论她们的儿子。“我的儿子是个教士,”第一位母亲自豪地说道,“他进入房间,人们都说,‘您好,阁下’。”

第二为母亲说:“我的儿子是位主教。他进入房间,人们都称,‘您好,大人’。”

“我的儿子是位红衣主教,”第三位母亲接着说,“他走进房间,人们都说,‘您好,尊敬的主教大人’。”

第四位母亲略思片刻。“我的儿子身高六英尺十,体重三百磅,”她说,“他要是走入房间,人们都说‘哦,我的上帝’!”

有关英语的小笑话篇二

A man took a pair of shoes to a shoe repair shop and said to the shoemaker, "I'd like you to repair these shoes for me, please."

"Certainly, sir," the shoemaker said.

"When will they be ready?" the man asked.

"I'm a bit busy, but they'll be ready for you on Thursday." he said.

That's fine," the man said, and left the shop.

The next morning he received a letter, offering him a job in another country. Within 24 hours he was on an airplane to his new job.

Twenty years passed and he returned to his hometown.

He remembered his shoes.

"They were a good pair of shoes," he thought. "I wonder if the shoemaker is still there and still has them. I'll go and see.擾He was pleased to see that the shoemaker was still in the same shop ,although he was an old man by now.

"Good morning," he said to him. "Twenty years ago, I brought in a pair of shoes to be repaired. Do you think you've still got them?"

"Name?" the old shoemaker asked.

"Smith," the man said.

"I'll go and see. They may be out back.

The shoemaker went out to the back of his shop -and a few minutes later returned ,carrying the pair of shoes.

"Here we are," he said. "One pair of brown shoes to be repaired. I'm a bit busy now, but they'll probably be ready on Thursday."

有关英语的小笑话篇三

Two Russian hunters meet. "I shot a gigantic bear yesterday," says Ivan. "Look at the hide!"

"How do you find such huge bears?" Sergei asks.

"Easy," says Ivan. "You stand in front of a cave and whistle. When the bear comes out, you shoot."

Weeks later the two meet again. Sergei is covered in bandages. "Didn't you follow my advice?" Ivan asks.

"Sure I did. I stood, in front of a cave and whistled, " Sergei replies.

"And what came out?"

"To me, "says Sergei, "it looked like the Trans-Siberian Express."

打猎的技巧

两个俄国猎人相遇。“我昨天打了一只巨熊,”伊凡说,“看看这兽皮!”

“你是如何发现这么大的熊的?”谢尔盖问道。

“简单,”伊凡说,“你站在一个洞前并吹哨子。熊出来时你就开枪。”

几周后,两人见面了。谢尔盖浑身缠满了绷带。“难道你没有听我的建议?”伊凡问。

“我当然是按你的建议做的。我站在一个洞前并吹哨子,”谢尔盖回答说。

“出来了什么?”

“向着我来的,”谢尔盖说,“像是穿越西伯利亚的快车。”

有关英语的小笑话篇四

At 2 a. m, Mrs. Culkin was convinced that she had heard a prowler in the living, room. "Tiptoe down-stairs," she told her husband. "Don' t turn on the lights. Sneak up him before he knows what's happening

Dutifully Mr. Culkin put on his robe. Just as he reached the bedroom door, his wife added, "And when you come back, bring me a glass of milk."

捎杯牛奶

半夜两点,科尔肯太太确信听到客厅有贼,便对丈夫说:“别开灯,蹑手蹑脚下楼,别让贼发觉,悄悄靠近他。”

科尔肯先生披上外套,责无旁贷地去捉贼。刚走到卧室门口,他妻子又补充说:“回来时给我捎杯牛奶。”

有关英语的小笑话篇五

We attended the wedding of an acquaintance's son. Because we did not know the young man or his bride, we decided to send them a practical household gift, a fire extinguisher. Apparently, the couple mass-produced their thank-you notes because we received a card saying: "Thank you very much for the nice wedding gift. We look forward to using it soon.

漂亮的结婚礼物

我们参加了一个熟人的儿子的婚礼。由于我们都不认识那个年轻人和他的新娘,所以我们决定送给他们一个实用的全家礼----一个灭火器。很明显,这对新人大批量制作了他们的感谢信,因为我们收到了一张卡片,上面写着:“非常感谢您的漂亮的结婚礼物,我们期待着不久就用到它。”

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