经典的初一英语小笑话

2017-03-03

初一英语小笑话大全

(一)

Three Turtles

No Wonder They Put Her Out

Jenny, (looking at the crying new baby): Has she just come from heaven?

Mother: Yes.

Jenny: Well, it's no wonder they put her out.

(二)

Joke of Today

A lesson about blood flow and circulation

A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, he said: "Now, students, if I stood on my head the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I should turn red in the face."

"Yes, sir," the boys said.

"Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?"

A little fellow shouted, "'It's because your feet aren't empty."

初一英语小笑话欣赏

(一)

Who Signed the Declaration of Independence

A Kentucky teacher was quizzing her students. "Johnny, who signed the Declaration of Independence?"

He said, "Damn if I know."

She was a little put out(激怒) by his swearing, so she told him to go home and to bring his father with him when he came back.

Next day, the father came with his son, sat in the back of the room to observe.

She started back in on her quiz and finally got back to the boy. "Now, Johnny, I'll ask you again. Who signed the Declaration of Independence?"

"Well, hell, teacher," Johnny said, "I told you I didn't know."

The father jumped up in the back, pointed a stern finger at his son, and said, "Johnny, if you signed that damn thing, hell, you damn well better admit it!"

(二)

Stupid Question

Dan was the doorman of a club in a big city. Everyday, thousands of people passed his door, and a lot of them stopped and asked him, "What's the time, please?"

丹在一个大城市的某个俱乐部当守门人。每天都有数千人经过他的门口,而且许多人都会停下来问他:“请问现在几点?”

After a few months, Dan said to himself, "I'm not going to answer all those stupid people any more. I'm going to buy a big clock and put it upon the wall here." Then he did so.

几个月后,丹想:“我不想再回答这些蠢人提出的问题了,我要去买一只大钟,把它挂在这儿的墙上。”于是他买了一只钟,把它挂在了墙上。

"Now people aren't going to stop and ask me the time," he thought happily. But after that, a lot of people stopped, looked at the clock and then asked Dan, "Is that clock right?"

“现在人们总不会再停下来问我时间了。”他高兴地想。可是打那以后,每天仍有许多人停下来,看看钟,然后问丹:“这钟准吗?”