经典文章:什么是“新时代淑女”

2017-03-15

摘录:在简奥斯汀时代,受过良好的教育是一位淑女的必备素质,当时的中产阶级普遍在家接受教育。在《傲慢与偏见》中,卡洛琳?宾利说:“一个女人必须精通音乐、歌唱、美术、舞蹈以及现代语文,那才当得起‘淑女’这个称号。”达西先生接着补充道,一位有修养的淑女还要多读书,长见识。

经典文章:什么是“新时代淑女”

Rumors are circulating that American actress Anne Hathaway is replacing Carey Mulligan to star in a remake of the 1964 film My Fair Lady. It's still a mystery who will finally snag the role of Eliza Doolittle, a vulgar flower girl who is transformed into a lady by a language expert, but the news has definitely called attention to the word “lady”。

有传闻称美国女星安妮?海瑟薇将取代凯瑞?穆里根,在1964年经典电影《窈窕淑女》的翻拍版中出演女一号。片中的女主人公伊莉莎?杜利特尔在一位语言学家的教导下,从粗俗的卖花姑娘变身为窈窕淑女,尽管最终伊莉莎这一角色将花落谁家仍是未知,但这则新闻毫无疑问将人们的视线转移到了“淑女”一词上。

The word always conjures up images of women in the Victorian era of British history or Jane Austen novels. But do we have to go back to dressing in that style to be a lady? What does being a lady actually mean in the 21st century?

这一词汇总是让人们联想起英国历史上的维多利亚时代以及简?奥斯汀小说中的女性形象。但要成为淑女,就非得选择这种复古装扮么?21世纪,淑女到底是如何定义的呢?

British etiquette tutor William Hanson told The Telegraph that being a lady today is all about elegance and confidence. “The behavior doesn't need to be something straight out of a Jane Austen novel,” he said. But that doesn't mean there are no specific rules to being a modern day lady. According to Hanson and other experts on etiquette, a real lady must tick all the following boxes of style and manner.

英国礼仪顾问威廉?汉森在接受《每日电讯报》采访时表示,现如今,淑女的判定标准不外乎优雅与自信。“行为举止不必照搬简?奥斯汀小说,”他说。但这并不意味着新时代淑女无规可循。汉森和其他礼仪专家一致认为,一位真正的淑女必须严格遵守以下这些有关风度与礼仪的条条框框。

Education

教育背景

Being educated was one of the essential qualities of a lady in the time of Jane Austen, when the middle class was commonly educated at home. In Pride & Prejudice, Caroline Bingley says: “A woman must have a thorough knowledge of music, singing, drawing, dancing and the modern languages to deserve the word [lady].” Mr Darcy adds that an accomplished lady must also improve her mind through extensive reading.

在简?奥斯汀时代,受过良好的教育是一位淑女的必备素质,当时的中产阶级普遍在家接受教育。在《傲慢与偏见》中,卡洛琳?宾利说:“一个女人必须精通音乐、歌唱、美术、舞蹈以及现代语文,那才当得起‘淑女’这个称号。”达西先生接着补充道,一位有修养的淑女还要多读书,长见识。

This educational requirement hasn't been compromised much. A lady by today's standards must educate herself in every possible way, from higher education to common sense manners, according to Candice Simpson, author of How to Be a Lady: A Contemporary Guide to Common Courtesy.

如今,对于教育背景的要求并未大打折扣。《淑女养成计划:当代基本礼仪指南》一书的作者坎蒂斯?辛普森说,当代标准下的淑女必须极尽所能地去提升自己,既要接受高等教育又要学习礼仪常识。

Dress code

着装要求

One of the biggest misconceptions of a lady is that she can't be fashionable, pointed out Eunice J Leong of elegantwoman.org. As a modern example of a lady, Duchess of Cambridge Kate Middleton has proved that it's possible to be elegant and fashionable at the same time. But elegant fashion is usually understated and simple ― ostentatious designer logos should be avoided.

来自elegantwoman.org网站的尤尼斯?J?梁指出,人们对淑女最大的误解就是淑女与时尚绝缘。作为当代淑女的典范,剑桥公爵夫人凯特?米德尔顿已经证明时尚与优雅可以并存。但优雅的时尚通常是低调而简约的——应避免高调的品牌标志。

In addition, according to Hanson, a lady never feels the need to show her flesh, legs or cleavage ― she always lets her natural beauty shine. Hanson even prescribes strict skirt lengths. He believes a lady should never wear any garment that rises too far above the knee ― if necessary, she should wear dark colored tights. Based on this rule, Lady Gaga, one of the most famous ladies of our times, should be simply Gaga.

英国礼仪顾问威廉?汉森还表示,真正的淑女从不需要露肉,露腿或者露乳沟——她永远散发出自然美。汉森甚至规定了严格的裙长要求。他认为,淑女不应穿任何膝上过短的裙子。若有必要,也应该配上一条深色的打底裤。从这一点看,时下最知名女性之一的Lady Gaga大概只能改叫Gaga了。

Table manners

餐桌礼仪

A true lady knows that she is expected to begin eating first, before the men, said Hanson. So don't faff around, as a true gentleman will just sit there watching his food go cold as you carry on chattering.

汉森表示,真正的淑女清楚自己在用餐时应该优先于男士。所以不要瞎忙活一通,因为一位真正的绅士可是会一直听着你唠叨然后眼睁睁地看着自己的食物冷掉的。

A much forgotten skill, added Hanson, is “turning the table”。 Britain's Queen Elizabeth II is still an advocate of this. It means speaking to the person on either side of you, one after the other. During the first course a lady speaks to the person on her left, during the second course she speaks to the person on her right, and so on. And no one ever talks across the table.

汉森补充道,另一个被大多数人所遗忘的礼仪技巧便是“扭转局面”。英国女王伊丽莎白二世仍是这点的提倡者。所谓“扭转局面”,意思是说要先后与坐在你两边人交谈。在享用第一道菜时,作为淑女要跟坐在自己左边的人交谈,上第二道菜时则换做与右边的人交谈,以此类推。切记,不要隔着桌子与人交谈。

Art of words

语言艺术

Although it can be tempting to gossip quietly about a friend or close acquaintance, a lady should avoid mean gossip, said Hanson. It leaves a bad impression on others, even if they are joining in. If you freely gossip about someone, others will begin to wonder if you gossip about them to others.

汉森说,尽管大家都爱背后讲朋友或熟人的闲话,但淑女必须远离那些尖酸刻薄的流言蜚语。这会给他人留下糟糕的印象,即便他们也乐在其中。当你无所顾忌,大爆某人的八卦时,其他人会想,你是不是也会在别人面前这样谈论他们。

Further tips for being a lady, as offered by Hanson, include:

此外,汉森还给出了以下几点淑女养成攻略:

Don't swear.

不要口出恶言。

Don't be brusque with others.

不要对他人无礼。

Don't overshare or talk about your private life loudly in public.

不要在公共场合过度分享或大声谈论自己的私事。

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