大学英语小笑话短文阅读
笑话是民族文化不可或缺的一部分。透过笑话我们可以看到一个民族的生存环境、生活方式、社会关系和心理特征等等。小编精心收集了大学英语小笑话短文，供大家欣赏学习!
大学英语小笑话短文：All In the family
都在这一家
Eight-year-old Sally brought her report card home from school .
八十岁大的 莎莉从学校把她的成绩报告卡带回家。
Her marks were good mostly .
她的成绩不错，
A's and a couple of B'S .
大部分都是A，还有几个B。
However ,her teacher had written across the bottom,
可是， 她韵老师在卡片下方写道：
"SALLY is a smart little girl,but she has one fault,
“莎莉是个聪明的小女孩，但是她有一个毛病。
she talks too much in school.I have an idea I am going to try,
她在学校太爱讲话。我有一个想法我要来试试看，
which I think may break her of the bad habit."
我认为.这个想法可能会让她改掉这个坏习惯。”
Sally's dad signed her report card,
莎莉的爸爸签了她的学习报告卡，
putting a note on the back ,
并在卡片背面注记：
"Please let me know if your idea work on SALLY
“如果你的想法对莎莉很有效，请你让我知道，
because I would like to try it out on her mother."
因为我想要把它试用在她妈妈身上。
大学英语小笑话短文：If only
倘若
A man is driving up a steep,narrow mountain road .
有个男人驾着车沿着一条又陡峭又窄小的山路往上开。
A woman is driving down the same road .
有个女人沿着同一条路往下开着车。
As they pass ench other ,
当他们彼此错车时，
the woman leans out of the window and yells"PI!!"
这个女人斜靠着车窗向外太喊：“猪!”
The man immediately leans out of his window and replies, "BITCH!!"
这个男人立刻也斜靠着他的车窗向外大声响应：“臭女人.!”
They each continue on their way ,
他们各自继续开车上路，
and as the man ronds the next corner ,
当这个男人绕到下一个转弯处的时候，
he crashes into a pig in the middle of road .
他竞撞上了在路中央的一只猪。
If only men would listen.
倘若男人会听话就没事了。
大学英语小笑话短文：The visit to the doctor
拜访医师
A Man asked his doctor if he thought he'd live to be a hundred .
一个男人问他的医师是否认为他会活到一百岁。
The doctor asked the man ,"Do you smoke or drink ?"
医师问这个男人：“你抽烟或喝酒吗?”
" No ,"he replied , "I have never done either ."
他回答说：“不，我从不抽烟喝酒。”
" Do you gamble,drive fast cars ,and fool around with woman?" inquired the doctor .
医师问说：“你赌博、开快车、玩女人吗?”
"No,I have done any of those things either."
“不，我也从不干那些事情。”
"Well then," said the doctor ," what do you want to live to be a hundred for?"
医师说：“那你干吗要活到一百岁呀?”