简单的英语短笑话大全

幽默和笑话有概念上的区别,笑话是滑稽言谈本身,幽默在这里则被作为心智和性情层面上的概念来看待。小编精心收集了简单的英语短笑话，供大家欣赏学习!

简单的英语短笑话：You've changed my mind

Lawyer: "Now that you have been acquitted, will you tell me truly? Did you steal the car?"

Client: "After hearing your amazing argument in court this morning, I?m beginning to think I didn?t."

简单的英语短笑话：Some last minute requests

A man woke up in a hospital bed and called for his doctor. He asked, "Give it to me straight. How long have I got?" Thephysician replied that he doubted that the man would survive the night.

The man then said, "Call for my lawyer." When the lawyer arrived, the man asked for his physician to stand on one side of the bed, while the lawyer stood on the other. The man then laid back and closed his eyes. When he remained silentfor several minutes, the physician asked what he had in mind. The man replied "Jesus died with a thief on either side. I just thought I'd check out the same way."

简单的英语短笑话：Stone the Prostitute

In the town square a nasty crowd had gathered, intending to stone to death a prostitute. From the crowd, Jesus strides forward, holds up his arms and yells "Let ye without sin cast the first stone!"

The crowd is contrite, for none amongst them can honestly say they are without sin. Then a little old, withered up woman comes hobbling up, picks up a good size rock and beans the prostitute right between the eyes.

Jesus just stands there with his hands on his hips and says, "Sometimes, Mother, you really piss me off!"

简单的英语短笑话：Children's Words

A little boy opened the big and old family Bible with fascination, and looked at the old pages as he turned them. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible, and he picked it up and looked at it closely. It was an old leaf from a tree that had been pressed inbetween the pages.

"Momma, look what I found," the boy called out.

"What have you got there, dear?" his mother asked. With astonishment, he claimed: "I think it's Adam's suit!"

简单的英语短笑话：Telling Lies

The minister was passing a group of young teens sitting on the Church lawn and stopped to ask what they were doing.

"Nothing much, Pastor," replied one boy. "We were just seeing who can tell the biggest lie about their sex life."

"Boys, boys, boys!" he scolded. "I'm shocked. When I was your age, I never even thought about sex."

In unison they all replied, "You win!"