让人狂笑不已的英文笑话

2017-03-08

笑话是民族文化不可或缺的一部分。透过笑话我们可以看到一个民族的生存环境、生活方式、社会关系和心理特征等等。下面是小编带来的让人狂笑不已的英文笑话,欢迎阅读!

让人狂笑不已的英文笑话篇一

Half or Five Tenths 半个还是十分之五

Teacher: Would1 you rather2 have one half of an orange or five tenths3?

Gerald: I'd much rather have the half.

Teacher: Think carefully4, and tell me why.

Gerald: Because you lose5 too much juice when you cut the orange into five tenths.

老师:你愿意要半个柑橘,还是十分之五个柑橘?

杰拉得:我宁可要半个。

老师:仔细想想,说出理由来。

杰拉得:因为你如果把柑橘切成十分之五,那柑橘汁就损失太多了。

让人狂笑不已的英文笑话篇二

Get to the hospital 医院要怎么走

An absent-minded person was standing1 in the middle of a busy intersection2 where a policeman was directing traffic, and he kept bugging3 the policeman because he was confused.

"Excuse me, Officer! Can you tell me how to get to the hospital?"

The officer was very busy and said, "Just stand here and you'll get there!"

有个很健忘的人站在车水马龙的十字路口正中央,那里有个警察正忙着指挥交通,而他不断地去干扰这位值勤的警员,因为他搞不清楚方向。

他问道:“请问一下,警察先生,可以告诉我医院要怎么走吗?”

这个忙不过来的警察对他说:“就站在这里,你就会到医院了!”

让人狂笑不已的英文笑话篇三

I'm the Devil 魔鬼的妹夫

A woman whose husband often came home drunk decided1 to cure him of the habit. One Halloween night, she put on a devil suit and hid behind a tree to intercept2 him on the way home.

When her husband came by, she jumped out and stood before him with her red horns, long tail, and pitchfork.

"Who are you?" he asked.

"I'm the Devil!" she responded.

"Well, come on home with me," he said, "I married your sister!"

一位妇人发现丈夫回家的时候总是烂醉如泥,她决定为丈夫治好这个毛病。一个万圣节夜里,她穿上一套魔鬼戏服,躲在树后,准备在丈夫返家时拦截他的去路。

当丈夫走近时,她从树后跳出来,站到他面前,头上带着红色的羊角、身后有长长的尾巴,手中握着钢叉。

“你是谁?”丈夫问到。

“我是魔鬼!”她回答到。

“噢,那你跟我一起回家吧,”丈夫说,“我娶了你的妹妹!”

让人狂笑不已的英文笑话篇四

One Engine Left

A 747 was halfway1 across the Atlantic when the captain got on the loud speaker, "Attention, passengers. We have lost one of our engines, but we can certainly reach London with the three we have left. Unfortunately, we will arrive an hour late as a result."

Shortly thereafter, the passengers heard the captain's voice again, "Guess what, folks. We just lost our third engine, but please be assured we can fly with only one. We will now arrive in London three hours late."

At this point, one passenger became furious. "For Pete's sake," he shouted, "If we lose another engine, we'll be up here all night!"

一架747客机正在跨越大西洋时,喇叭里传来了机长的声音:“旅客们请注意,我们的四个引擎中有一个丢失了。但剩下的三个引擎会把我们带到伦敦的。只是我们要因此晚到一小时。”

过了一会儿,旅客们又听到机长的声音:“各位,你们猜怎么啦?我们刚又掉了第三个引擎。但请你们相信好了。只有一个引擎我们也能飞,但要晚三个小时了。”

正在这时,一位乘客非常气愤地说:“看在上帝的份上,如果我们再掉一个引擎,我们整夜都要待在天上了。”

让人狂笑不已的英文笑话篇五

When do people talk least?

Student A: When do people talk least1?

Student B: In February.

Student A: Why?

Student B: Because February is the shortest month of a year.

学生甲:人们什么时候说话最少?

学生甲:人们在什么时候说话最少?

学生乙:在二月。

学生甲:为什么呢?

学生乙:因为二月是一年中最短的一个月。

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