双语英文笑话阅读大全
冷笑话是一种新兴的语言现象,伴随着网络的普及它已经渗透到了青年群体的日常生活,偶尔爆出的一两句冷笑话能使交流氛围变得轻松愉悦,也能展示交谈者的幽默和智慧。下面是小编带来的双语英文笑话阅读，欢迎阅读!
双语英文笑话阅读篇一
Mother, You Can Come Down 妈妈，您可以下来了
The cruise ship my friend was working on socked at a Mexican port during a very high tide. Everyone on board was forced to use the ship's narrow gangplank as a passageway to the dock far below.
The staff stood motionless when a passenger in her 70's appeared at the top of the plank1. There wasn't room for anyone to assist her, so she edged along slowly and finally made it to the dock safely, to everyone's relief. As she stepped down, she turned, looked back at the top of the plank and shouted, "It's okay, mother, you can come down now."
我的一个朋友在游船上工作。由于潮水当时涨得很高，船停靠在墨西哥的一个港口，游客们不得不踩着一条很窄的跳板才能上岸。
当一位七十多岁的老妇人站在跳板的顶端时，船上所有的工作人员都吓呆了。跳板太窄，根本没有搀扶老人的空间。因此，老妇人只好慢慢地侧着身子往下走，最终当她安全抵达码头后，大家悬着的心才放了下来。下来后，老妇人转过身，冲着跳板的另一端喊道：“没事的，妈妈，您现在可以下来了。”
双语英文笑话阅读篇二
Thirty Years and Five Minutes 30年和5分钟
A rich Paris banker begged a well-known artist to do a little thing for his album1. The artist did the little thing and asked a million francs.
“Why, it only took you five minutes to do it,” said the banker.
“Yes,” replied the artist, “but it took me thirty years to learn how to do it in five minutes.”
一位很富有的巴黎银行家恳求一位著名的画家为自己画一张小画。画家画完之后，向他收取一百万法郎的报酬。
“为什么?你仅用了5分钟的时间。”银行家说。
“是的，”画家回答，“可是我用了30年的时间才学到这5分钟里所做的事。”
双语英文笑话阅读篇三
Who Is the Greatest? 谁最了不起
A judge, a bishop1, and a conductor were having a discussion. All three were rather vain men, and their talk soon turned to the question of which of them was the greatest.
"Well," said the judge, "My position is one of dignity and power. When I walk into the courtroom, the bailiff says ‘All rise!’ and all the people stand to pay me honor."
"That's very nice," said the bishop. "People stand in your honor; but when people have an audience with me they kneel, kiss my ring, and they address me as 'Your Holiness.'"
The conductor snorted and said, "I think I got you both beat; when I step onto the podium, as guest conductor, the people look down, put their hands over their eyes, and say 'Oh, my God!'"
一个法官、一个教堂主教和一位指挥家正在进行一场辩论。三个人都是虚荣自负的人，他们的话题很快转到他们之中谁是最伟大的人上。
“嗯，”法官说，“我的职业既高贵又拥有权力，当我走进法庭的时候，狱警会说‘全体起立!’接着所有人都会站起来向我致意。”
“好极了，”主教说，“人们站起来向你致敬。当我出现在教堂里，人们会跪在我的面前，亲吻我的戒指，并称呼我为‘陛下’。”
指挥家哼了一声，说道：“我觉得你们都不如我。当我作为客座指挥走上指挥台的时候，人们都垂着头，用手捂着眼睛，说道，‘噢，我的上帝!’”
双语英文笑话阅读篇四
Prepare Yourself 自己准备
A story around campus1 has it that a student once sent a telegram to his parents reading: "Mom-flunked all courses. Kicked out of school, Prepare Pop."
Two days later he received a response: "Pop prepared. Prepare yourself."
在校园里广为流传着这样一个故事：有一次，一个学生给他的父母发了一封电报，上面写道：“妈妈，我的功课没有一门及格的，我已经被学校开除了，请爸爸做好准备。”
过了两天，这个学生收到回电：“爸爸已经准备好了，你自己也做好准备吧!”
双语英文笑话阅读篇五
Cheater 作弊者
In class one day, Mr. Johnson pulled Johnny over to his desk after a test, and said, "Johnny, I have a feeling that you have been cheating on your tests."
Johnny was astounded1 and asked Mr. Johnson to prove it. "Well," said Mr. Johnson, "I was looking over your test and the question was, 'Who was our first president?', and the little girl that sits next to you, Mary, put 'George Washington', and so did you."
"So, everyone knows that he was the first president."
"Well, just wait a minute," said Mr. Johnson. "The next question was. 'Who freed the slaves?' Mary put 'Abraham Lincoln', and so did you.”
"Well, I read the history book last night and I remembered that," said Johnny.
"Wait, wait," said Mr. Johnson. "The next question was,'Who was president during the Louisiana Purchase?' Mary put 'I don't know', and you put, 'Me neither'.”
考试后的一天，约翰逊先生在课堂上把强尼拉到讲台旁边问道：“强尼，我认为你在这次考试中作弊了。”
强尼非常惊讶，要求约翰逊先生拿出证据。“好的，”约翰逊先生说，“我看到你的试卷上有这样一个问题：‘我们的第一任总统是谁?’紧挨着你的那个名叫玛丽的女孩写的是‘乔治·华盛顿’，你写的也是这个答案。”
“当然，每个人都知道他是我们的第一任总统。”
“噢，等一下，”约翰逊先生说，“下一个问题是：‘谁解放了黑奴?’玛丽的答案是‘亚伯拉罕·林肯’，你的答案也是一样。”
“噢，我昨天晚上