有关英语冷笑话短文精选

2017-05-09

民间笑话是一种颇受人们喜爱的民间叙事类型,材料丰富,有广泛的现实基础。小编整理了有关英语冷笑话短文,欢迎阅读!

有关英语冷笑话短文:Blonde Painting

One day a blonde comes out of the tanning salon. She wants to make some money so she goes to one of the rich neighborhoods. She rings the door

bell and says, "HI, is there anything I could do for your house or you???"

The man thinks and says, "Sure, can paint my porch. You will find

all the stuff in the garage."

The girl says, "O.K., How much will you pay me?"

The man says, "How much does fifty bucks sound?"

The blonde quickly agrees and get straight to work. The wife who had heard the conversation inside says,

"50 bucks, I hope she knows the porch goes all around the house!"

25 minutes later the girl knocks on the door and says, "O.K. I am done. Can I have my money now?" Surprised the man replies, "O.K. Let me get the money"

He comes back and the girl says as she is leaving, "By the way, it's a Ferrari, not a Porch!"

有关英语冷笑话短文:Blonde Phone Call

A blonde with two red ears went to her doctor. The doctor asked her what had happened to her ears and she answered, "I was ironing a shirt and the phone rang - but instead of picking up the phone, I accidentally picked up the iron and stuck it to my ear." "Oh Dear!" the doctor exclaimed in disbelief. "But, what happened to your other ear?" "The jerk called back!"

有关英语冷笑话短文:Nude Painting

Wanting a portrait with which to surprise his wife, a businessman asked a blonde female painter he'd been recommended to paint him in the nude.

"No," the talented blonde artist said. "I don"t do that sort of thing."

"But what if I double your fee?" he pleaded.

"Nope, sorry. Won't do it."

"How about I give you five times what you normally get?"

"Oh, okay then," said the artist, "but I'm keeping my socks on. I need a place to put my brushes."

有关英语冷笑话短文:Angry Blonde

A blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her. She goes out and buys a gun. She goes to his apartment unexpectedly and sure enough, she opens the door and finds him in the arms of a redhead. Well, now she's angry! She opens her purse to take out the gun but as she does so, she is overcome with grief. She takes the gun and points to her head. The boyfriend yells, "No, honey, don't do it!!" "Shut up," she says, "You're next."

有关英语冷笑话短文:Stuck In The Hotel

An airline captain was helping a new blonde flight attendant prepare for her first overnight trip. Upon their arrival, the captain showed the flight attendant the best place for airline personnel to eat, shop and stay overnight.

The next morning as the pilot was preparing the crew for the day's route, he noticed the newstewardess was missing. He knew which room she was in at the hotel and called her up to ask what happened to her.

She answered the phone, crying, and said, "I can't get out of the room!"

"You can't get out of your room?" the captain asked. "Why not?"

She replied, "There are only three doors in here," she sobbed, "one is the bathroom, one is the closet, and one has a sign on it that says 'Do Not Disturb'!"

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