简单的小学英语笑话阅读

前苏联著名作家高尔基说过,“哪里有人,哪里就有笑声。”从古到今,笑话是人们生活中不可缺少的“调剂品”。本文是简单的小学英语笑话，希望对大家有帮助!

简单的小学英语笑话：A tasty meal 一顿美餐

A tourist in Africa sent his mother an exotic bird for her birthday. When he got back to the States, he called her. "Hi, Mom," he said. "How'd you like the bird I gave you?"

"It was delicious."

"You ate the bird!" the guy shrieked. "He was very expensive. He could talk!"

"Well, if he was so smart," replied the mother, "Why didn't he say something?"

一位在非洲旅行的旅客送给了他母亲一只奇特动人的鸟作为生日礼物。他回到美国后，打电话问道：“妈，你好。你喜欢我送您的那只鸟吗?”

“太好吃了!”

“您把它吃了?”小伙子惊叫了起来。“那只鸟可贵了，它还会说话呢?”

“噢，如果它照你说的那么聪明的话，他为什么没告诉我呀?”母亲回答说。

简单的小学英语笑话：I've sold those to someone else

A large store was having the spring sale on shoes and boots. It was the first day of the sale, and the shoe department was full of women who were eagerly trying to buy them. There were all kinds of shoes and boots in a variety of colors, and the prices had been reduced a lot, because the store wanted to get rid of as many as possible in order to make room for their new stock.

The cashiers were kept busy, and at one moment a woman came to one of them with her money in her hand and said, "I don't need a bag, thank you. I'm wearing the shoes I bought." She pointed to them on her feet.

"Would you like a bag to put your old shoes in then?" the cashier asked politely as she took the woman's money.

"No, thank you," the woman answered quickly, "I've sold those to someone else."

一家大商店正在进行鞋子和长筒靴的春季大销售。这是大销售的第一天，因此售鞋部挤满了急切想购买鞋子和长筒靴的女人们。鞋子和长筒靴的种类很多，颜色各异，而且价格大降，因为商店想把尽可能多的鞋子和长筒靴卖掉，为了给新近货物腾出地方来。

收银员们一直都很忙，而在某一个时刻，一位妇女手里拿着钱来到一位收银员面前说道，“我不需要袋子，谢谢你。我正穿着我买的鞋。”她指着她脚上的鞋子。

“ 那么你不需要一个袋子装你的旧鞋子吗?”当她接过那妇女的钱时，收银员很有礼貌地说道。

“不需要，谢谢你，” 那妇女很快地回答说，“ 我刚把旧鞋卖给别的人了。”

简单的小学英语笑话：Love at the front door 前门的爱

I was hospitalized for a few days, and my wife reported that my dog really missed me. "She spends the night at the front door, awaiting your return," she said. "What an example of true love," I replied. "I wonder if you'd be that concerned a about me?" "Honey," my wife answered, "If you were gone overnight, and I didn't know where you were, you can be sure I'd be waiting for you at the front door."

我住了几天医院。妻子告诉我，我的狗非常想我。 “它总是在前门旁过夜，等待你的归来。”妻子说。 “这的确是一个至爱的例子，”我说：“我真不知你是否也像狗一样关心我呢?” “亲爱的，如果你一夜未归，我却不知你的去处，我一定会在前门等你的。”妻子立刻回答。

简单的小学英语笑话：Serious Swimming

There was a competition to swim from Santa Monica to Catalina doing only the breaststroke, and the three women who entered the race were a brunette, a redhead and a blonde.

After approximately 14 hours, the brunette staggered up on the shore and was declared the fastest breaststroker.

About 40 minutes later, the redhead crawled on shore and was declared the second place finisher.

Nearly 4 hours after that, the blonde finally came ashore and promptly collapsedin front of the worried onlookers. When the reporters asked why it took her so long to complete the race, she replied,

"I don't want to sound like a sore loser, but I think those two other girls were using their arms."

简单的小学英语笑话：Dummy vs Dummy

A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and one night he's doing a show in a small town in Arkansas. With his dummy on his knee, he starts going through his usual dumb blonde jokes.

A blonde in the 4th row stands on her chair and starts shouting: "I've heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes. What makes you think you can stereotype women that way? What does the color of a person's hair have to do with her worth as a human being? It's guys like you who keep women like me from being respected at work and in the community and from reaching our full potential as a person. Because you and your kind continue to perpetuatediscrimination against not only blondes, but women in general, and all in the name of humor!"

The embarrassed ventriloquist begins to apologize, and the blonde yells, "You stay out of this, mister! I'm talking to that little idiot on your knee."