双语英语笑话短文大全

冷笑话是近几年新兴的一种语言现象,它轻松诙谐、别具一格,给我们紧张的生活增添了几分轻松的情趣,它一出现便受到了大多数人的喜爱。本文是双语英语笑话短文，希望对大家有帮助!

双语英语笑话短文：是谁偷的车

Carlson was charged with stealing a Mercedes Benz, and after a long trial, the jury acquitted him. Later that day Carlson came back to the judge who had presided at the hearing.

卡尔森被指控盗窃一辆奔驰轿车，经过长时间的审讯，陪审团将他无罪释放。之后，卡尔森找到了听证会上主持的法官。

“Your honor,” he said, “I want to get out a warrant for that dirty lawyer of mine.”

“法官大人，”他说，“我想申请一张逮捕令抓捕那个肮脏的律师。”

“Why?” asked the judge, “He won your acquittal. What do you want to have him arrested for?”

“为什么?”法官问，“他让你赢得了无罪释放。难道他有什么罪吗?”

“Well，your honor,”replied Carlson, “I didn't have the money to pay his fee, so he went and took the car I stole.”

“是的，法官大人，”卡尔森回答，“我没有钱付我的律师费，他就把我那辆偷来的车开走了。”

双语英语笑话短文：健忘症

An older lady gets undressed and starts to get into the bathtub. She gets about halfway into the tub and thinks, "Was I getting into the tub or getting out?”

一个上了年纪的女人脱了衣服准备去洗澡。她刚把一只脚迈进浴缸就想:我是打算进去呢?还是正要出去?

She calls out, "Bernice! Was I getting into the bathtub or getting out?"

她大声喊:“伯尼斯!我这是正要去洗澡还是打算要出来呢?”

Bernice says, "Well I don’t know. I' 11 have to come up and look.” Bernice starts walking up the stairs to the bathroom, gets halfway up and thinks to herself, “Was I going up the stairs or down? " She calls out "Sally! Was I going up or down the stairs?”

伯尼斯说:“我不知道，我这就上去看看。”伯尼斯开始往楼上的浴室走，走到一半时想到:我这是要上楼呢还是下楼?她大喊:“莎莉!我这是要上楼呢还是要下楼呢?”

Sally, who is just being with Bernice down in the living room calls back,“How should I know?” and thinks to herself, “I' m glad I’m not losing my mind like the other people in this house.”

刚还和伯尼斯在楼下客厅里的莎莉喊:“我怎么知道?”她自己想:我真的很高兴我不像这个屋子里的其它人一样没记性。

双语英语笑话短文：补洞

A young man came home from work and found his bride upset. "I feel terrible,” she said. "I was pressing your suit and I burned a big hole in the seat of your trousers.”

丈夫下班回到家里，发现自己的新娘心绪烦乱。“我心里太难受了，”她说。“我在给你熨西装时把裤子的臀部烧了个大洞。”

“Forget it ,” consoled her husband. “Remember that I’ve got an extra pair of pants for that suit.”

“没事儿，”丈夫安慰她说。“你忘了我这套衣服有两条裤子。”

“Yes,” said the woman, cheering up. "And it’s lucky you have. I used them to patch the hole.”

“是的，”妻子高兴地说，“幸亏你还有一条，我后来就用它来补了这个洞了。”