英语美文：如何维系永恒的婚姻与爱情

以下是小编整理的情感类英语美文欣赏： 如何维系永恒的婚姻与爱情，希望对你有所感触。

Challenges to a Lasting Relationship

Dr. Bonnie Eaker Weil

"Of all the misconceptions about love, the mostpowerful and pervasive is the belief that falling inlove is love or at least one of the manifestations oflove." -- M. SCOTT PECK

People who are married or in committedrelationships are healthier, wealthier, and happier. Sowhy do more than 60 percent of marriages end indivorce? Why has the national divorce rate climbed more than 200 percent in the last thirtyyears? And why are fewer people getting married today than ever before?

The answers to these questions are plentiful, but the main reason is simple. It's easy to "fall"in love, but very few people know how to stay in love. Even though staying in love is our"smartest" choice all the way around! Recent studies on marriage prove it's one of the majoringredients in life-long success for men and women. "

It lengthens life, substantially boosts physical and emotional health, and raises income overthat of single or divorced people or those who live together," reported an article in the New YorkTimes. Marriage has also been found to boost happiness, reduce the degree of depression,and provide protection from sexually transmitted diseases.

So let's wake up, make up, and turn this trend around! One of the most startling pieces ofevidence that shows people are not in touch with what's really going on in their partnerships isthe fact that the majority of people who file for divorce say they didn't think there was arelationship-threatening problem just six months prior to breaking up. Another shocker isthat most couples wait six years or more to seek professional help when their relationship is indanger. By the time they do wake up and smell the coffee, it's often too late.

Truly there is no reason to resign yourself to a bad relationship ? whether you're dating ormarried. Rather than changing partners and ending up this same predicament again, you canlearn to have a fabulous relationship with the partner you already have! I strongly encourageyou to make the relationship you have work, because there is a higher rate of divorce andadultery in second marriages.

Getting rid of your partner does not get rid of the problem, because half of the "problem" isyours. You can walk out on your marriage, but you can't run away from yourself, no matterhow hard you try! Rather than blaming each other, couples can learn how to work as a teamand coach each other through the troubled times and power struggles.

To do this, you must create a "safe" relationship so you can express your needs and fears andeffectively resolve anger and conflict. More relationships break up because people don't knowhow to validate each other (that frustration escalates to become anger) than for any otherreason. This is truly a shame, because the skills for "fighting fair" are very easy to master withjust a little practice and patience.

One of the biggest causes of unresolved anger between people is a lack of understanding. Menand women have different strengths and weaknesses, different ways of expressing ourselves,and different "childhood wounds" that we're trying to heal.

While it may seem like we're from different planets we are actually very much alike when itcomes to our need and desire for love and intimacy. We only behave differently in our questsfor closeness. Stop doing what you think is "fair" or "right" and start doing what works! It's notabout "working harder" it's about "working smarter".