英语小笑话，英语幽默小故事
我国古代笑话是几千年来人民群众的口头文学形式。这些笑话当中,有的揭露了当时社会的各种矛盾;有的反映了丰富多采的阶级斗争和生产斗争生活。下面是小编带来的英语幽默小故事，欢迎阅读!
英语幽默小故事篇一
The visit to the doctor 拜访医师
A Man asked his doctor if he thought he'd live to be a hundred .
一个男人问他的医师是否认为他会活到一百岁。
The doctor asked the man ,"Do you smoke or drink ?"
医师问这个男人：“你抽烟或喝酒吗?”
" No ,"he replied , "I have never done either ."
他回答说：“不，我从不抽烟喝酒。”
" Do you gamble,drive fast cars ,and fool around with woman?" inquired the doctor .
医师问说：“你赌博、开快车、玩女人吗?”
"No,I have done any of those things either."
“不，我也从不干那些事情。”
"Well then," said the doctor ," what do you want to live to be a hundred for?"
医师说：“那你干吗要活到一百岁呀?”
英语幽默小故事篇二
All In the family 都在这一家
All In the family
都在这一家
Eight-year-old Sally brought her report card home from school .
八十岁大的 莎莉从学校把她的成绩报告卡带回家。
Her marks were good mostly .
她的成绩不错，
A's and a couple of B'S .
大部分都是A，还有几个B。
However ,her teacher had written across the bottom,
可是， 她韵老师在卡片下方写道：
"SALLY is a smart little girl,but she has one fault,
“莎莉是个聪明的小女孩，但是她有一个毛病。
she talks too much in school.I have an idea I am going to try,
她在学校太爱讲话。我有一个想法我要来试试看，
which I think may break her of the bad habit."
我认为.这个想法可能会让她改掉这个坏习惯。”
Sally's dad signed her report card,
莎莉的爸爸签了她的学习报告卡，
putting a note on the back ,
并在卡片背面注记：
"Please let me know if your idea work on SALLY
“如果你的想法对莎莉很有效，请你让我知道，
because I would like to try it out on her mother."
因为我想要把它试用在她妈妈身上。
英语幽默小故事篇三
Gone Shopping 购物
Our supermarket had a sald on boneless chicken breasts,and a woman I know ontended tostock up .
我们的超级市，场在廉价拍卖无骨鸡胸，我认识的某位女士打算去多买一些。
At the store,However,she was disappointed to find only a few skimpy prepackaged portopnsof the poultry,
然而，到了这家肉店的时候她感到很失望，因为只找到一点点事先就包装好的鸡肉，
so she complained to the butcher.
所以她就向这位肉店老板抱怨。
"don't worry,lady," he said.
他说：“小姐，别担心，
"I will pack some more trays and have them ready for you by the time you finish shopping."
我会替你多包几盘，在你买完东西的时候把它们准备好。”
Several aisles later ,my friend heard the butcher's voice boom over th public-address system:
逛完几个走道之后，我的朋友听到肉店老板的声音透过公共广播系统隆隆地说
"Will the lady who wanted bigger breasts please meet me at the back of the store?"
“那位想要大胸部的小姐请到本店后方来见我好吗?”
英语幽默小故事篇四
浪漫之旅 A romantic trip
A: Hey, good looking, wanna go on a romatic cruise?
A:亲爱的，想不想来一场浪漫之旅
B: Who would book us on a cruise?
B:谁能帮我们预定这次巡航呢?
A: The U.S.S. ark
A:u.s.s方舟
英语幽默小故事篇五
Laboratory Tests 实验室检查
Two children were sitting outside a clinic.
有两个小孩子坐在一间诊疗室外面。
One of them was crying very loudly.
其中一个小孩子哭得非常犬声。
2nd Child;Why are you crying?
第二位小孩子说：“你为什么哭呀?”
1st Child:I came here for blood test.
第一位小孩子说：“我来这里验血呀”
2nd Child：So?Are you afraid?
第二位小孩子说：“那又怎样?你害怕呀?”
1st Child :No .Not that.For the blood test,they cut my finger.
第一位小孩子说：“不怕呀，又不是那样啦。因为验血的话，他们要割我的手指头啦。”
At this,the second one started crying.
一听到这么说，第二位小孩子就开始哭了，
The first one was astonished.
第一位小孩子就非常惊讶。
1st Child :Why are you crying now?
第一位小孩子说：“你现在为什幺哭呀?”
2nd Child :I have come for my urine?test!
第二位小孩子说：“我来这里微尿液检验的啦.!”