幽默英语故事精选

2017-03-21

笑话使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松,在人们的日常生活中起着重要调剂作用。下面小编为大家带来幽默英语故事精选,欢迎大家阅读!

幽默英语故事精选1:

One day a girl brings home her boyfriend and tells her father she wants to marry him. After talking to him for a while, he tells his daughter she can't do it because he's her half brother. The same problem happens again four more times! The girl starts to get pissed off. She goes to her mom and says, "Mom... What have you been doing all your life? Dad's been going around laying every maiden in the town and now I can't marry any of the five guys I like because they have turned out to be my half brothers!!!"

Her mom replies, "Don't worry darling, you can marry any one of them you want, he isn't really your dad."

一天,一个女孩把男孩子带回家见父亲,说要跟这个男孩结婚。她父亲跟男孩谈了一会之后,对她说她不能嫁给这个男孩,因为男孩跟她其实是同父异母的兄弟。之后,女孩又认识了另外四个男孩并一一带回家见父亲,请求父亲同意他们结婚,但结果都是一样,这些男孩竟然跟她都是同父异母!女孩真的是被气坏了。她跟母亲说,“妈,你这一辈子到底是怎么过的?爸爸在镇上到处胡搞,现在我都谈到第五个男孩了,但现在一个都不能嫁,因为他们最后都是跟我一个爸爸”!

女孩说完,她母亲回答说,“亲爱的,不用担心,你可以跟他们中的任何一个结婚,你爸爸其实也,也不是你的亲爹”。

幽默英语故事精选2:

Two small boys, not yet old enough to be in school, were overheard talking at the zoo one day. "My name is Billy. What's yours?" asked the first boy. "Tommy," replied the second. "My Daddy's an accountant. What does your Daddy do for a living?" asked Billy. Tommy replied, "My Daddy's a lawyer." "Honest?" asked Billy. "No, just the regular kind", replied Tommy.

在动物园,我无意中听到两个学龄前的小男孩在聊天。“我叫Billy。你叫什么名字?”一个男孩问题。“Tommy”,另一个男孩回答。

“我爸爸是一位会计师,你爸爸是做什么的?”Billy问Tommy。

“我爸爸是一位律师,”Tommy回答。

“真的吗?”Billy问。

“不是啦,就跟别的律师一样。”Tommy回答。

幽默英语故事精选3:

Smith goes to see his supervisor in the front office. "Boss," he says, "we're doing some heavy house-cleaning at home tomorrow, and my wife needs me to help with the attic and the garage, moving and hauling stuff.""We're short-handed, Smith" the boss replies. "I can't give you the day off.""Thanks, boss," says Smith "I knew I could count on you!"

一天,史密斯去见他的客户部领导,“老板”,斯密斯说,“我们家明天要大搞清洁,我老婆需要我回去帮忙清洁阁楼和车库,搬搬挪挪什么的。”“斯密斯啊,你也知道,我们现在人手已经不够了”老板说,“明天的假我是没法给你批了”。“多谢老板,” Smith说,“我就知道跟着您干准没错”。

幽默英语故事精选4:

Professor Tom was going to meet his students on the next day, so he wrote some words on the blackboard which read as follows: "Professor Tom will meet the class tomorrow." A student, seeing his chance to display his sense of humor after reading the notice, walked up and erased the "c" in the word "class." The Professor noticing the laughter, wheeled around, walked back, looked at the student, then at the notice with the "c" erased--calmly walked up and erased the "l" in "lass", looked at the flabbergasted student and proceeded on his way.

Tom教授打算第二天与他的学生见面,因此他在黑板上写道:“Tom教授明天将和大家见面”。

一位学生看到这条通知后,觉得展示自己幽默感的机会来了,就走上前,将“class”中的“c”擦掉,教授听到笑声,转过身走回来,看了看那位学生,又看看被改动过的通知,不动声色地走上前,把“lass” 中的“l”擦掉,看了看那位目瞪口呆的学生,教授扬长而去。

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