简短有内涵的英语笑话

2017-03-03

由于冷笑话是近些年来爆红的一种新的言语幽默形式,到目前为止,几乎没有对其细致且系统的研究。下面小编整理了简短有内涵英语笑话,希望大家喜欢!

简短有内涵英语笑话摘抄

地铁(中英)

A Yankee fan,a Met fan, and a blond are sitting together on the subway when the lights go out and the car goes completely dark. There’s a kissing noise, and then the sound of a really loud slap.

一名扬基队的球迷,一名迈特队的球迷和一位金发女郎坐在地铁里。这时,地铁里的灯突然灭了,一片黑暗。有一声亲吻的声音,然后就是一个很响的耳光声。

When the subway car's lights come back on, the blond and the Met fan are sitting as if nothing happened,and the Yankee fan is holding his slapped face.

当地铁里的灯重新亮了以后,金发美女和迈特队的球迷坐在那里,就像是什么都没发生一样,而那个扬基队的球迷则捂着被打的脸。

The Yankee fan is thinking, "That Met fan must have kissed the blond and she swung at him and missed, slapping me instead.”

那个扬基队球迷想:“一定是那个迈特队的球迷亲了那个金发美女,然后她没打到他而打到了我。”

The blond is thinking, "That Yankee fan must have tried to kiss me, accidentally kissed the Met fan, and got slapped for it.”

那个金发美女在想:“那个扬基队球迷一定是想亲我,但意外的亲到了那个迈特队球迷,所以挨了一巴掌。”

And the Met fan is thinking; "This is great. The next time the subway car's lights go out, I’11 make another kissing noise and slap that Yankee fan again.

那个迈特队球迷想:“这太棒了。下次地铁灯再灭的时候,我就再弄一声亲吻的声音,然后再去打那个扬基队的球迷。”

简短有内涵英语笑话鉴赏

口信(中英)

It is December 30 1999 11:00 P. M.,Bill Clinton, Bill Gates and Boris Yeltsin appear before god.

一九九九年十二月三十日晚上十一点,比尔·克林顿、比尔·盖茨和鲍里斯·叶利钦出现在上帝面前。

God:I have called you here with me because to my opinion you are the three most important men on earth. I want you to spread the message that I will destroy the earth on January 1. I will now send you back. . . spread the message.

上帝说:“我把你们叫到这里来,是因为我觉得你们是世界上三个最重要的人。我想让你们散布一个消息,就是我将在一月一日的时候摧毁地球。我现在把你们放回去,散播这个消息。”

Boris Yeltsin: He gathers his comrades and says, "Friends, I have good news and bad news for us: The good news is God exists; the bad news is that the world will be destroyed soon.”

鲍里斯·叶利钦:他招集他的同志然后说:“朋友们,我有两个坏消息:一是上帝确实存在;二是地球将很快就会毁灭。”

Bill Clinton: Clinton gathers his staff members and senators and says, "I have good news and bad news: The good news is that God exists; the bad news is that he will destroy the world.”

比尔·克林顿:他招集参赞和议员然后说:“我有一个好消息和一个坏消息:好消息是上帝确实存在;坏消息是他将毁灭地球。”

Bill Gates: Gates gathers all his managers and says, "I just have good news for you guys:1 am one of the three most important people on the planet; The Y2K一bug is solved.”

比尔·盖茨:他招集所有的经理然后说:“我有两个好消息告诉大家。一个就是我是这个星球上三个最重要的人之一,二是计算机千年虫问题终于能解决了。”

简短有内涵英语笑话赏析

理论与现实(中英)

One day a son asked his father what was the difference between "theory" and "reality". His father thought and then said "Go ask your Mother if she would sleep with the next door neighbor for a half million dollars.”

一天,儿子问他的爸爸“理论”与“现实”有什么区别。他的爸爸想了想,然后说:“去问问你妈妈,她是否愿意为了五十万美元去和隔壁邻居睡觉。”

The son went to his mother and asked her. She thought about it for a minute and

then said, "Yes,yes I would.’,The son returned to his father and told him her reply. The father then told the son to go ask his sister if she would sleep with the next door neighbor's son for a half million dollars. The son went to his sister and asked her. She thought about it for a minute and then replied, "Yes, yes I would.”

儿子找到他妈妈问了她那个问题。她想了一分钟后说:“是的,我愿意。”儿子回到他爸爸那里告诉了他妈妈的答案。孩子的爸爸又让儿子去问他的姐姐是否愿意为了五十万美元去和隔壁邻居的儿子睡觉。孩子找到他的姐姐问了那个问题。他姐姐想了一分钟然后告诉他,她也愿意。

The son returned to his father and told him his sister also said she would. The father said,"Well son,there you have it. In theory, we're living with a million bucks. In reality,we're living with a couple of whores.”

孩子回到他爸爸这里把姐姐的答案也告诉了他。爸爸说:“很好儿子,现在你就知道区别了。从理论上讲,我们家现在已经有一百万美元了。从现实来讲,我们家有两个妓女。”

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