英语短篇笑话带翻译精选
笑话,是民间文学中的一朵奇葩,具有语言诙谐、故事生动、短小精悍的特点。下面是小编带来的英语短篇笑话带翻译，欢迎阅读!
英语短篇笑话带翻译篇一
区别 Difference
"I can always tell a graduate class from an undergraduate class," observed the instructor in one of my graduate engineering courses at California State University in Los Angeles.
"When I say, 'Good afternoon,' the undergraduates respond, 'Good afternoon." But the graduate students just write it down."
“研究生班和本科生很容易就能区别开来，”在洛杉矶加利福利亚州立大学给我们研究生上工程学课的老师如此说。
“我说‘下午好’，本科生们回答说‘下午好’。研究生们则把我说的话记在笔记本上。”
英语短篇笑话带翻译篇二
Lawyer’s Advice
律师的忠告
A doctor and a lawyer were attending a cocktail party when the doctor was approached by aman who asked advice on how to hanle his ulcer.
有一位医生和一位律师出席一场鸡尾酒会，当时有一名男子走近这位医生询问有关如何处理他的溃疡的忠告。
The doctor mumbled some medical advice,then turned to the lawyer and asked,
这位医生就咕噜咕噜说了一些医疗上的忠告，然后转向这位律师。
"How do you handled the situation when you are asked for advice during a social function?"
并问他：“当你在社交宴会场合中被人询间忠告的时候，你都怎么处理这个情形呢?”
"Just send an account for such advice" replied the lawyer.
这位律师回答说： “就寄出一张听取忠告的账单呀”。
On the next morning the doctor arrived at his surgery and issues the ulcer-stricken man a $50account.
下一天早上，这位医生来到他的诊疗窒;开出一张五十元账单给这名罹患溃疡的男子。
That afternoon he received a $100 account from the lawyer.
而在那天下午他竟然就收到一张从律师那里寄来的一百元账单。
英语短篇笑话带翻译篇三
A drunk 醉汉
A police officer pulls over a guy who has been weaving in and out of the lanes.
有一位警官把一个在车道上穿进穿出，迂回蛇行的男子拦到路边。
He goes up to the guy's window and says "Sir,I need you to blow into this breathalyzer tube."
他走到这名男子的车窗旁边说：“先生，我要你对着这个酒精测试管吹一口气。”
The man says,"Sorry officer I can't do that.I am an asthmatic.If I do that I'll have a really badasthma attack."
这名男子说：“对不起呀，警官，我不能吹呀。我是个气喘病患者呀。如果我吹的话，我就会真的患很严重的气喘病。”
"Ok,fine.I need you to come down to the station to give a blood sample."
“ 好， 好。我要你到警察局进行血液检验。”
"I can't do that either.I am a hemophiliac.If I do that,I'll bleed to death."
“我也能抽血检验呀。我是个血友病患呀。如果我抽血检验，我就会流血过多而死呀。”
"Well ,then we need a urine sample."
“嗯，那我们就要你进行尿液检验吧。”
"I am sorry officer I can't do that either.I am also a diabetic.If I do that I'll get really low bloodsugar."
“对不起呀 ，警官，我也不能验尿呀。我也是一个糖尿病患者呀。如果我验尿的话，我的血糖就真的会变得很低。”
"Alright then I need you to come out here and walk this white line."
“好吧，那我要你出来到这边，走这条白线。”
"I can't do that,officer."
“警官，我办不到呀。”
"Why not? "
“为什么办不到?”
"Because I am too drunk to do that."
“因为我喝得太醉了，所以不能那么做呀。”
英语短篇笑话带翻译篇四
Butcher and Lawyer
肉商与律师
A dog ran into a butcher and grabbed a roast off the counter.
有一只狗，跑进一家肉店把一块烤肉从台子上抢走。
Fortunately,the butcher recognized the dog as belonging to a neighbor of his.
很幸运地，肉商辨认出’这只狗是属于他邻居的。
The neighbor happened to be a lawyer.
这位邻居碰巧又是一位律师。
Incensed at the theft,the butcher called up his neighter and said,
这起窃盗激怒了这位肉商。于是他就打电话给他的邻居说：
"Hey,if your dog stole a rasat from my butcher shop,would you be liable for the coast of themeat?"
“喂，如果你的狗儿从我的肉店偷走了一块烤肉，你会为这块肉的损失费用负责任吗?”
The lawyer replied,"Of course,how much was the roast?"
这名律师回答说：“当然会呀，这块烤肉多少钱呢?”
"$8."Afew days later the butcher received a check in the mail for $8.
“八元。”几天后，这位肉商收到一封邮件，里面有一张八元的支票。
Attached to it was an invoice that read:
这张支票却附上了一张发票，上面写着：
Legal Consultation Service 150.
“法律咨询服务 ：一百五十元。”
英语短篇笑话带翻译篇五
Three Doctors
三个医生
Three doctor are in the duck blind and bird fliesoverhead.
三名医生藏身在观察野鸭的隐蔽处，有一只鸟从头上飞过。
The general practitioner looks at it and says,
一般家庭医生看着他说：
"Looks like a duck,flies like a duck,it's probably a duck,"
“看起来像-只鸭子，飞起来像一只鸭子……它可能是一只鸭子”。
shoots at it but misses and the bird flies aay.
就对着它射击，但是没射中，这只鸟飞走了。
The next bird flies overhead,
第二只鸟从头上飞过。
and the pathologist looks at it,then looks through the pages of a bird manual,and says,
病理学家看着它，然后仔细翻翻阅好几页的野鸟手册说
"Hmmmm,green wings,yellow bill,quacking sound,might be a duck."
“嗯……绿色的翅膀，黄色的鸟嘴，嘎嘎的叫声……可能是一只鸭子。”
He arises his gun to shoot it,but the bird is long gone.
他举起他的枪来射它，但是这兵鸟飞一了好远。
A third bird flies over .
第三只鸟从头上飞过。
The surgeon raises his gun and shoots almost without looking,brings the bird down,and turnsto the patholoogist and says,
外科医生举起他的松，看都不看就射击，把鸟击落后就转向病理学家说：
"Go see if that was a duck."
“你去看看那是不是一只鸭子。”
英语短篇笑话带翻译篇六
Bring me the winner
-- Waiter, this lobster has only one claw.
-- I'm sorry, sir. It must have been in a fight.
-- Well, bring me the winner then.
给我那个打赢的吧
-- 服务员，
这个龙虾只有一只爪。
-- 对不起，先生，这只肯定打过架了。
-- 哦， 那给我那个打赢的吧。
英语短篇笑话带翻译篇七
Dick was seven years old, and his sister, Catherine, was five. One day their mother took them to their aunt's house to play while she went to the big city to buy some new clothes.
The children played for an hour, and then at half past four their aunt took Dick into the kitchen. She gave him a nice cake and a knife and said to him, "Now here's a knife, Dick. Cut this cake in half and give one of the pieces to your sister, but remember to do it like a gentleman."
"Like a gentleman?" Dick asked. "How do gentlemen do it?"
"They always give the bigger piece to the other person." answered his aunt at once.
"Oh" said Dick. He thought about this for a few seconds. Then he took the cake to his sister and said to her,"Cut this cake in half, Catherine.".
迪克年龄七岁，他的妹妹凯瑟琳五岁。一天，妈妈把他们带到姨妈家去玩，自己就到大城市去买些新的衣服。
孩子们玩了个把小时，在四点半的时候，姨妈领着迪克走进了厨房。她交给迪克一块精美的蛋糕和一把刀子，并对他说：“喏，迪克，给你刀子，把这块蛋糕一切为二，给你妹妹一块。不过，你得记住要做得像一个绅士那样。”
迪克问：“像一个绅士?绅士怎样做呢?”
他姨妈马上回答说：“绅士总是把大的一块让给别人的。”
迪克说了一声“噢”。他对此想了一会，然后，他把蛋糕拿给妹妹，并对她说：“凯瑟琳，你来把这块蛋糕一切为二吧。”