英语笑话故事短文欣赏

2017-04-08

笑话的作用在于可以减轻人的在生活和工作上的心理压力,保持身体健康的状态。小编分享英语笑话故事短文,希望可以帮助大家!

英语笑话故事短文:Birds And Bees

Little Johnny's father asked him, "Do you know about the birds and the bees?" "I don't want to know!" little Johnny said, bursting into tears. Confused, the father asked little Johnny what was wrong. "Oh dad," Little Johnny sobbed, "At age six I got the 'there's no Santa' speech. At age seven I got the 'there's no Easter bunny' speech. Then at age 8 you hit me with the 'there's no tooth fairy' speech! If you're going to tell me now that grown-ups don't really have sex, I've got nothing left to live for!"

英语笑话故事短文:What do you want for Xmas?

A little boy goes to the local mall to see Santa. When Santa askes the little boy what he wants for Christmas, the little boy replies, "I don't know". So Santa starts thinking of things that the little boy might like and spells it out. Each time he says a letter, he pushes the boys nose. B-I-K-E. C-A-T.

Etc. Santa runs out of ideas and asks the little boy one more time what he wants for Christmas. The little boy says, "I want some P-U-S-S-Y, and I know you have some because I can smell it on your fingers.

英语笑话故事短文:Marine garb

My husband's cousin married a former Marine who now works for United Parcel Service.

They bought their four-year-old son two stuffed bears... one in a UPS uniform and the other in Marine garb.

When the boy seemed confused, his father brought out a picture of himself in full Marine dress.

"See, Connor?" he explained, pointing to the photo and then to the bear. "That's Daddy."

Connor's eyes went from one to the other, and then he asked in a puzzled voice, "You used to be a bear?"

英语笑话故事短文:Blood Circulation

A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, he said: "Now class, if I stood on my head, the blood as you know, would run into it and I should turn red in the face."

"Yes, sir," the class said.

"Then why is it that while I am standing upright in an ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?"

A class member shouted, "'Cause your feet ain't empty."

英语笑话故事短文:Mounted Cop

There was a cop on his horse waiting to cross the road when a little boy on his new shiny bike stopped beside him.

"Nice bike," the cop said, "did santa bring it to you?"

"Yep," the little boy said,"he sure did!"

The cop looked at the bike and while handing the boy a $20 ticket he said, "Next year, tell Santa to put a license plate on the back of it."

To go along with the cop, the little boy said, "Nice horse you got there sir, did Santa bring it to you?" "Yes,He sure did," said the cop.

The little boy looked up at the cop and said, "Next year tell Santa to put the dick on underneath the horse instead of on top."

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