1分钟好笑的英语笑话演讲

笑话是指幽默的话语。从结构上看 ,一则话语只要具有能产生幽默效果的关键语句即成笑话 ;笑话中人物对“合作原则”四准则有意无意的违反常常产生幽默。下面是小编带来的1分钟好笑的英语笑话，欢迎阅读!

1分钟好笑的英语笑话篇一

让人崩溃的驾驶

A guy was driving when a policeman pulled him over. He rolled down his window and said to the officer, "Is there a problem, Officer?""No problem at all. I just observed your safe driving and am pleased to award you a $5,000 Safe Driver Award. Congratulations. What do you think you're going to do with the money?"He thought for a minute and said, "Well, I guess I'll go get that drivers' license."The lady sitting in the passenger seat said to the policeman, "Oh, don't pay attention to him - he's a smartass when he's drunk and stoned(醉酒的) ."The guy from the back seat said, "I TOLD you guys we wouldn't get far in a stolen car!"At that moment, there was a knock from the trunk(行李箱) and a muffled(听不清的) voice said, "Are we over the border yet?"

一个家伙开车的时候警察追了上来。这个家伙要开窗户问警察：“怎么了，警官?”

“没事，我观察到了你的安全驾驶技术，很高兴你获得了价值5000美元的安全驾驶奖。祝贺你!你认为你要拿这笔钱去做什么?”

他想了一会说“哦，我觉得，我应该去考驾照”。

坐在副驾驶位的女士说"别在意他说的，他喝醉了酒说胡话呢.“

后面座位的家伙说”我告诉你，偷来的车我们走不远的。“

此时，行李箱出现了敲击声并传出一个模糊不清的声音：“我们穿过了边境了吗?”

1分钟好笑的英语笑话篇二

Wedding or Not

Uncle Frank, at 79, was a healthy and wealthy man, a lifelong bachelor. He courted a lot, he said, but "never boiled over-just simmered." On a whim, he decided to take a trip around the country to look up nearly a dozen old girlfriends.

Upon his return he exclaimed, "Whew! Thank goodness I never married any of those women - They're all widows now!

弗兰克叔叔七十八岁了，富有而健康。他是个终生单身汉。他曾追求过很多女孩，但“从不过热----见好就收”。一天他突发奇想，决定四处走走，去看看他那些接近一打的旧时女友。

他回来即叹道：“嘘!谢天谢地幸亏我没娶那些女人中的任何一个。如今她们都成寡妇了!”

1分钟好笑的英语笑话篇三

A Boy with a Big Head大头娃娃

A boy cried to his mother, "All the children make fun of me. They say I have a big head."

"Don't listen to them," his mother said, "You have a beautiful head. Now stop crying and go to the store to buy twenty pounds of patotoes."

"Where is the shopping bag?"

"I haven't got one-use your hat."

一个小男孩向他母亲哭诉道：“他们都取笑我，说我脑袋大。” “别听他们的，”他母亲安慰道，“你有一个很漂亮的脑袋。好啦，别哭了，去商店买十斤土豆来。”

“购物袋在哪儿?”

“没购物袋了----就用你的帽子吧。”

1分钟好笑的英语笑话篇四

A Small Surprise 小小的意外

When his wife was expecting their third child, a father decided to tell his two sons, ages seven and nine, the facts of life. He checked out several books from the library on how parents should approach the subject. After stumbling through an explanation, he took a deep breath, and said, "Now, boys, do you have any questions?"

"Yes," the younger boy answered immediately.

"Go ahead," said the man, his heart in his throat.

"Can we," his son asked, "have new baseball gloves?"

当妻子要生第三胎时，父亲决定给分别已七岁和九岁的两个儿子讲关于性的知识。他从图书馆查出几本书，都是关于父母如何涉及这个话题的。在结结巴巴地解释一番后，他长出了一口气，然后说：“好了，孩子们，有什么问题吗?”

“有，”小儿子立即回答。 “问吧，”爸爸说，心提到了嗓子眼儿。

“我们，”儿子问道，“可以得到新棒球手套了吗?”

1分钟好笑的英语笑话篇五

All Right 没关系

Hurrying my 11-year old daughter to school, I made a right turn at a red light when it was prohibited. Uh-oh, I said, realizing my mistake. I just make an illegal turn.I guess it's all right, my daughter replied, The police car behind us did the same thing.

我赶着开车将11岁的女儿送到学校去，在红灯处右拐了，而那是不允许的(译注:在一些国家如英国,其交通规则是车辆左行的,与我国相反)。啊噢，意识到犯了错误，我说。我刚才拐弯是违章的。我想那没关系的，女儿回答说：我们后面的警车也同样拐了弯。