简单爆笑的英文小笑话大全

2017-05-13

笑话是日常生活中常见的一种幽默。与一般日常会话不同,笑话刻意违反合作原则,由此衍生出会话含意,并利用会话含意之间的冲突实现其预定功能。小编整理了简单爆笑的英文小笑话,欢迎阅读!

简单爆笑的英文小笑话:Fairy tales

What's the difference between a northern fairytale and a southern fairytale? A northern fairytale begins "Once upon a time..." A southern fairytale begins 'Y'all ain't gonna believe this shit!...

简单爆笑的英文小笑话:Redneck Hero

Two boys are playing football in the Golden Gate Park when one is attacked by a Rottweiler.

Thinking quickly, the other boy rips off a board of the nearby fence, wedges it down the dog's collar and twists, breaking the dog's neck.

A reporter who is strolling by sees the incident, and rushes over to interview the boy.

"Forty Niners fan saves friend from vicious animal", he starts writing in his notebook.

"But I'm not a Niners fan," the boy replies.

"Oakland Raiders fan rescues friend from horrific attack," says the reporter as he writes in his notebook.

"I'm not a Raiders fan either," the boy says.

"Then what are you?" the reporter asks.

"I'm a Cowboys fan!" the boy says proudly.

The reporter starts a new sheet in his notebook and writes, "Redneck bastard kills family pet!"

简单爆笑的英文小笑话:Its the way you talk

A University of Georgia student was visiting a Yankee relative in Boston over the holidays.

He went to a large party and met a pretty co-ed. He was attempting to start up a conversation with the line, "Where does you go to school?"

The coed, of course, was not overly impressed with his grammar or southern drawl, but did answer his question, "Yale," she replied.

The Georgia student took a big, deep breath and yelled, "WHERE DOES YOU GO TO SCHOOL?"

简单爆笑的英文小笑话:Trigonometry

A hillbilly was going to send his boy to school and was discussing with the principal what courses he should take. The principal was talking about math courses and suggested he would probably later on take geometry and trigonometry. The hillbilly heard this and said, "Great! Be sure and give him lot's of that there triggernometry! He's got to be the worst shot with a rifle of anybody I have ever seen!"

简单爆笑的英文小笑话:Give Budda a chance

It was graduation night at Cox High School and they were about halfway through the ceremony when the principal said, "Ladies and Gentlemen, we have a problem, Bubba is a few credits short and won't be able to graduate tonight."

Well now, Bubba was the starting right guard for Cox's football team, and when the student body heard that he wasn't going to graduate, they all jumped up and started to chant, "Give Bubba another chance, give Bubba another chance!"

Pat Dye and the principal had a quick conference and afterward, the principal announced that they have decided to give Bubba another chance.

Bubba is told that he will be given a "one question" math test and if he passes, he can graduate.

The question is, "What is 2 plus 3?" Bubba thinks for about 20 minutes and finally says, "I have it! The answer is 5!"

There is complete silence in the auditorium for a couple of seconds and then the entire Cox High School football team jumps up and begins to chant, "Give Bubba one more chance. Give Bubba one more chance!"

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