关于英语的简单笑话大全
笑话是近年来语言学研究比较盛行的话题,其研究方法主要侧重于语用学研究。下面是小编带来的关于英语的简单笑话，欢迎阅读!
关于英语的简单笑话大全
(一)
噪音的优点
Wherever I drove my old car over 55 miles per hour ,it vibrated terribly, so I decided to sell it. My first customer wanted to buy the car, and I battled with my conscience over whether or not to tell him of the vehicle's problem. Finally I did the right thing. Expecting him to drop the deal, I was surprised by his reply. That's okay, he said. I'm buying this car for my daughter. If she complains about a vibration, I'll know she's driving too fast.
每当我驾驶我那辆旧车时速超过55英里时，它就剧烈地震动起来，所以我决定卖掉它。我的第一位买主想买这辆车。围绕是否告诉他这辆车的问题，我经历了一番良心的较量。终于我做了件正确的事情。我想他会放弃这个交易，却对他的回答吃了一惊。 “那没什么，”他说，“我是给我女儿买这车的。如果她抱怨震动的话，那我就知道她开得太快了。”
(二)
结婚礼物和感谢信
We attended the wedding of an acquaintance's son. Because we did not know the young manor his bride, we decided to send them a practical household gift, a fire extinguisher. Apparently,the couple mass-produced their thank-you notes because we received a card saying: Thank youvery much for the nice wedding gift. We look forward to using it soon.
我们参加了一个熟人的儿子的婚礼。由于我们都不认识那个年轻人和他的新娘，所以我们决定送给他们一个实用的全家礼----一个灭火器。很明显，这对新人大批量制作了他们的感谢信，因为我们收到了一张卡片，上面写着：“非常感谢您的漂亮的结婚礼物，我们期待着不久就用到它。”
关于英语的简单笑话欣赏
(一)
我的病就是什么
A senile actress went to see a doctor. The doctor enquired : “How old are you?” The actresssaid: “ Twenty-two.” So the doctor scribbled down on her case history : “Amnesia.”
一个徐娘半老的女演员去看医生，医生问：“您的年龄?”女演员说：“22岁。”于是医生在病历上写道：“丧失记忆。”
(二)
法国和比基尼
The swimsuit posed (提出，摆姿势)on the T stage for the first time in 1946 at a time when theUnited States did an atomic bomb experiment on the Bikini Island. From then on this type offemale mini-swimsuit divided into two portions that had the same blast force with atomic bombwon another name: Bikini. A reporter interviewed the mayor of Paris at that time, the mayorcommented artfully(巧妙，狡猾) :" There seems no lack of cloth in Paris."
1946年泳装第一次在 T 型台亮相，时值美国在比基尼岛进行原子弹试验，这种具有同样冲击力的服装从此 就有了另一个名字：比基尼。对于这一分成两部分的超小女子泳装，记者采访了当时 的巴黎市市长，市长说：“我们巴黎并不缺布吧。”
经典的关于英语的简单笑话
(一)
Talking clock 会说话的钟
While proudly showing off his new apartment to friends, a college student led the way into the den.
一个学生带他朋友们参观他的新公寓，甚是得意。
What is the big brass gong(锣) and hammer for? one of his friends asked. That is the talking clock, the man replied.
那个大铜锣和锤子是干什么用的?他的一个朋友问他。那玩意儿厉害了，那是一个会说话的钟，学生回答。
How's it work?Watch, the man said and proceeded to give the gong an ear shattering pound with the hammer.
这钟怎么工作的，他的朋友问。看着，别眨眼了，那学生走上前一把操起铜锣和锤子，拼命地敲了一下，声音震耳欲聋。
Suddenly, someone screamed from the other side of the wall, Knock it off, you idiot! It's two o'clock in the morning!
突然，他们听到隔壁墙那边有人狂叫，别敲了，你这白痴!现在是凌晨两点钟了!
(二)
研究生和本科生的区别
"I can always tell a graduate class from an undergraduate class," observed the instructor in oneof my graduate engineering courses at California State University in Los Angeles."When I say,'Good afternoon,' the undergraduates respond, 'Good afternoon." But the graduate studentsjust write it down."
“研究生班和本科生很容易就能区别开来，”在洛杉矶加利福利亚州立大学给我们研究生上工程学课的老师如此说。“我说‘下午好’，本科生们回答说‘下午好’。研究生们则把我说的话记在笔记本上。”