有关英语笑话短文阅读

2017-04-09

英语笑话,顾名思义,是一种通过幽默的文字或图示来达到令人会心一笑或捧腹大笑效果的文学形式。小编整理了有关英语笑话短文,欢迎阅读!

有关英语笑话短文:Duel

A little boy came home from the playground with a bloody nose, black eye, and torn clothing.

It was obvious he'd been in a bad fight and lost. While his father was patching him up, he asked his son what happened.

"Well, Dad," said the boy, "I challenged Larry to a duel. And, you know, I gave him his choice of weapons."

"Uh-huh," said the father, "that seems fair."

"I know, but I never thought he'd choose his big sister!"

有关英语笑话短文:The climate of New Zealand

Teacher: Matthew, what is the climate of New Zealand?

Matthew: Very cold, sir.

Teacher: Wrong.

Matthew: But, sir! When they send us meat it always arrives frozen!

有关英语笑话短文:Bad Language

Young Justin has a cursing problem, and his father is getting tired of it. So he decides to ask a shrink what to do. The shrink says, “Negative reinforcement. Since Christmas is coming up, ask Justin what he wants from Santa. If he curses while he tells you his wish list, leave a pile of dog poop in place of each gift he requests.”

Two days before Christmas, Justin’s father asks him what he wants for Christmas. “I want a damn teddy bear lying beside me when I wake up. When I go downstairs, I want to see a damn train going around the damn tree. And when I go outside, I want to see a damn bike leaning up against the damn garage.”

On Christmas morning, Justin wakes up and rolls into a pile of dog poop. Confused, he walks downstairs and sees another pile under the tree. He walks outside, looks at a huge pile of dog poo by the garage, and walks inside. His dad smiles and asks, “What did Santa bring you this year?”

Justin replies, “I think I got a goddamn dog, but I can’t find the son of a bitch!”

有关英语笑话短文:A Present 凯特的礼物

Kate: Mom, do you know what I'm going to give you for your birthday?

Mom: No, Honey, what?

Kate: A nice teapot.

Mom: But I've got a nice teapot.

Kate: No, you haven't. I've just dropped it.

凯特:妈妈,你知道我要给你一件什么生日礼物吗?

妈妈:不知道,宝贝,是什么呀?

凯特:一把漂亮的茶壶。

妈妈:可是我已经有一把漂亮的茶壶了呀。

凯特:不,你没有了。我刚刚把它给摔了。

有关英语笑话短文:Great Event

Teacher: What great event happened in 1809?

Little Willy: Abraham Lincoln was born.

Teacher: Correct. And what great event happened in 1812?

Little Willy: Abraham Lincoln had his third birthday.

林肯过生日

老师:1809年发生了什么重大事件?

小威利:亚伯拉罕·林肯诞生。

老师:正确。那么1812年发生了什么重要事件呢?

小威利:亚伯拉罕·林肯过他的三周岁生日。

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