简单的两个人英语笑话故事

2017-06-16

笑话使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松。与此同时,笑话也是人们反对极权和专制制度的有力武器。小编整理了简单的两个人英语笑话故事,欢迎阅读!

简单的两个人英语笑话故事篇一

A middle-class man decides to go off and join a monastery, which requires an oath of silence. No speech is allowed except for two words every 5 years, to sum up one’s experiences to the head monk.

一个中产阶级男子决心远离红尘,去当修道士。每个出家的人都必须要立个沉默誓言,那就是每五年只允许说两个字,作为对这一段时间所经历事情的总结。

After the first 5 years,the monk asked him what two words described his experiences and all he said was "HARD BEDS.”

第一个五年过去了,当修道士让他用两个字总结这五年的经历时,那人说道“破床”。

When the next 5-year period came the monk asked how things were and he replied: "BAD FOOD.”

又过了五年,当修道士再次问道他的时候,他回答“猪食”。

After 5 more years,he walked up to the monk and said,"I QUIT!”

第三个五年过后他对修道士说“放弃”。

The monk nodded and muttered,“Yes , this doesn't surprise me. You've been doing nothing but complaining for the past 15 years!”

道十点了点头喃喃地说道:“果不出我所料,这十五年来除了抱怨以外你什么也没有做。”

简单的两个人英语笑话故事篇二

Did you hear the one about the ethnic who came home and found his wife between the sheets with another man? Well,he pulls out a gun, saying,“ That’s enough! I’m going to put an end to this once and for all!” Then he puts the gun up to his head.

你有没有听说过有一个人,当他回到家后发现自己的妻子正和另一个男人在鬼混,他立刻拔出手枪喊到:“我受够了!看来今天是要做一个了结了!”说完他将枪口对准自己的头。

The unfaithful wife shouts, "Don’t do it! Don’t do it! Don’t kill yourself !” The enraged ethnic replies, "Shut up, bitch,because you're next!”

这时那个荡妇喊到:“不,不要这样,你可不能自杀呀!”那人听了愤怒地吼道:“闭嘴,泼妇,下一个死的就是你!”

简单的两个人英语笑话故事篇三

A construction worker was rushed to the hospital after cutting himself badly. The doctor told the nurse to prepare a painkiller. "Don’t bother Doctor," said the man. "I' ve been through a lot worse."

一个伤痕累累的建筑工人冲进了一家医院,医生马上让护士去拿止痛药,“不必麻烦您了,医生。”那人说道,“比这更痛的伤我都经历过了。”

"More painful than this?" the doctor asked.

“比现在的伤还要痛吗?”医生问。

"I’11 tell you about the second most painful accident I ever had. I was hunting one day and had to take a shit so I dropped my pants and squatted. I tripped a bear trap and BOOM,the thing snapped shut on my balls."

“我先说说让我感到还不是最痛苦的那件事吧,一天我在打猎的时候突然想要大便,于是就脱掉裤子蹲在地上,不料被捕熊的夹子绊倒了,那东西夹住了我的皋丸。”

The doctor winced, "That’s awful. But tell me, what could be worse?"

医生听后颤抖了一下,说道“太可怕了,那告诉我什么又是最痛苦的事呢?”

"When I reached the end of the chain."

“当我摸到锁链尽端的时候。”

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