外国最新幽默故事阅读
笑话是一种增强快乐的文化,常常以篇幅短小,故事情节简单,文笔巧妙的形式出现,给人以出乎意料,并且取得笑意的艺术效果的文化。在忙碌的生活,我们也需要偶尔的放松一下自己。下面小编为大家带来外国最新幽默故事三则,希望大家喜欢!
外国最新幽默故事:愚蠢的对手
Okay, this is an actual episode of the Newlywed Game.
这是在新婚夫妇间进行游戏时发生的真实插曲。
The question was "What is your husband's favorite South American country?"
问题是:“说出你的丈夫最喜欢的一个南美洲的国家。”
The first wife answered Brazil.
第一个妻子的回答是巴西。
The second wife was a bit puzzled as to what the term "South American" meant. She answered "New Mexico.” The MC explained to her that that was an U. S. state, not a South American country. Still confused as to what this strange adjective" South American" meant, she answered "Mexico.”
第二个妻子对南美洲的概念不是很清楚,她答道:“新墨西哥”。婚礼主持人向她解释说那只是美国的一个州而不是南美的城市。但她还是没弄清楚哪是“南美洲”,于是回答:“那就是墨西哥”。
The third wife was sure of her answer. She wasn't as confused as wife number two and showed it. When it came time to give her answer, she answered very confidently "I know what my husband’s favorite South American country is: it's Africa” The MC allowed it.
第三个妻子对自己的回答显得胸有成竹,她不像刚才那个妻子那样感到困惑不解,当轮到她回答时,她信心百倍地说:“我丈夫最喜欢的南美洲国家是非洲!”主持人点了点头。
The fourth wife answered "Mexico" as well.
第四个妻子的答案同样是“墨西哥”。
The only husband to give the same answer as his wife was the fourth, who answered "Mexico.”
只有一位丈夫—第四位妻子的丈夫—给出了同妻子一样的答案:“墨西哥”。
外国最新幽默故事:关于身份问题的教育
Scene一A grade one classroom on a warm summer afternoon.
场景:夏天一个炎热的下午,一年级的教室里。
Teacher: We are going to have a spelling competition this afternoon. Anyone who can spell a word correctly can go home early. We’11 start with Mary. What did you do at lunchtime?
老师问:“今天下午我们来进行一场拼词比赛。谁能准确无误地拼出一个单词就可以早回家了。我们先从玛莉开始,你午饭时间去干什么了?”
Mary: I played in the sandpit.
玛莉回答:“我在沙坑里玩。”
Teacher: Mary, can you spell "pit?"
老师说:“玛莉你可以拼写‘沙坑’这个词吗?”
Mary: P …I … T?
玛莉: "P. . . I. . . T?"
Teacher: Very good,you may go. Now Tommy , what did you do at lunch?
老师:“非常好,你可以走了。现在轮到汤米了,你午饭时间都干什么了?”
Tommy: I was playing with my toy car.
汤米:“我在玩我的玩具车。”
Teacher: Tommy,can you spell "car"?
老师:“那你会拼‘车’这个词吗?”
Tommy: C…A …R
汤米:"C. . . A. . . R"
Teacher: Very good,you may go. Now Johnny, why are you crying?
老师:“非常好,你也可以走了。下一个,约翰尼,你为什么哭呀?”
Johnny(sniff): Because Tommy and Mary wouldn’t play with me at lunchtime, just because I'm black.
约翰尼(抽泣):“汤米和玛莉都不和我玩,就因为我是个黑人。”
Teacher: My God. That's racial prejudice. Johnny,can you spell "racial prejudice?"
老师:“上帝呀,这简直就是种族歧视,好了约翰尼,你能把‘种族歧视’拼出来吗?”
外国最新幽默故事:魔鬼的血
Arthur was sitting outside his local pub one day,enjoying a quiet pint and generally feeling good about himself, when a Nun suddenly appears at his table and starts decrying the evils of drink.
一天,亚瑟正坐在当地酒吧的外面,享受着啤酒的美味,逍遥自得。这时一个修女突然出现在他的桌前,开始谴责饮酒所带来的罪恶。
"You should be ashamed of yourself young man! Drinking is a the blood of the devil!”
“年轻人。你应该为你自己而感到耻辱!喝酒是一种罪过!酒精就像是魔鬼的鲜血!”
Now Arthur gets pretty annoyed about this,and goes on the offensive. "How do you know Sister?"
这时亚瑟感到有些厌烦就开始辩解:“大姐你是怎么知道的?”
"My Mother Superior told me so.”
“我们修道院的院长这么告诉我的。”
"But have you ever had a drink yourself`? How can you he sure that what you are saying is right?"
“但是你自己从来没有喝过,你怎么就知道你说的是正确的呢?”
"Don’t be ridiculous一of course I have never taken alcohol myself.”
“别开玩笑了,我自己当然没有沾过酒了。”
"Then let me buy you a drink,一if you still believe afterwards that it is evil 1 will give up drink for life.”
“那么我请你喝一杯吧。如果你尝过之后还是那么认为,我就一生不再饮酒。”
"How could I,a Nun,sit outside this public house drinking?!”
“我,一个修女,怎么能这样做?坐在酒吧外面喝酒?!”
"I’ll get the barman to put it in a teacup for you , then no one will know.”
“我会叫服务员把酒倒在茶杯里的,没有人会知道。”
The Nun reluctantly agrees, so Arthur goes inside to the bar.
那个修女极其不情愿的同意了。然后亚瑟走进了酒吧。
"Another pint for me, and a vodka,” then he lowers his voice and says to the barman,"and could you put the vodka in a teacup?"
“再给我来一杯啤酒和一杯伏特加”,他压低他的嗓音对服务员说,“你能不能把伏特加酒倒在一个茶杯里?”
"Oh no! It’s not that bloody Nun again is it?"
“噢,天哪!是不是那个魔鬼之血’的修女又来骗酒喝了?”