最搞笑的英文小笑话欣赏

2017-06-09

笑话使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松。在交际场合,能恰到好处地讲个笑话或自创一个幽默,不仅可以体现自己的语言水平,还可以提升个人魅力。小编分享最搞笑的英文小笑话,希望可以帮助大家!

最搞笑的英文小笑话:In The Air

Matt and his wife lived in the country. Matt was very stingy and hated spending money. One day a fair came to the nearby town.

"Let's go to the fair, Matt," his wife said. "We haven't been anywhere for a long time."

Matt thought about this for a while. He knew he would have to spend money at the fair. At last he said, "All right, but I'm not going to spend much money. We'll look at things, but we won't buy anything. "

They went to the fair and looked at all the things to buy. There were many things Matt's wife wanted to buy, but he would not let her spend any money.

Then, in a nearby field, they saw a small airplane.

"Fun flights!" the notice said, " $ 10 for 10 minutes.

Matt had never been in an airplane and he wanted to go on a fun flight. However, he didn't want to have to pay for his wife, as well.

"I've only got $ 10, " he told the pilot. "Can my wife come with me for free?" The pilot wasn't selling many tickets, so he said, "I'll make a bargain with you. If your wife doesn't scream or shout, she can have a free flight."

Matt agreed, and got into the small airplane with his wife.

The pilot took off and made his airplane do all kinds of things. At one moment it was flying upside down.

When the plane landed, the pilot said, "0. K. your wife didn't make a sound. She can have her ride free."

"Thank you," Matt said. "It wasn't easy for her, you know, especially when she fell out."

麦特和妻子住在乡下。麦特很吝啬,讨厌花钱。一天附近的镇子逢集。

“我们去赶集,麦特,”妻子说。“我们很久没出去了。”

麦特想了一会儿。他知道在集市上一定得花钱。最后他说:“好吧,但我不打算花太多钱。我们只看不买。”

他们去集市,看看所有可买的东西。有很多东西麦特的妻子想买,但麦特不让她买。

然后在附近的露天场地,他们看到一架小飞机。

“有趣的飞行。”海报上写着,“10分钟10美元。”

麦特从来没有乘过飞机,所以他想乘一次小飞机。然而他不想付他妻子的票钱。

“我只带了10美元,”他对飞机驾驶员说,“我妻子能免费和我一起乘飞机吗?”驾驶员没卖出多少票,所以他说:“我和你做个交易。如果你妻子不尖叫,也不叫出声来,她就能免费飞行。”

麦特同意了,他和妻子一起登上了飞机。

飞机起飞了,驾驶员让飞机做出各种各样的动作。有一会儿飞机倒着飞行。

飞机着陆时,驾驶员说,“好吧,你妻子没发出任何声响。她就不用买飞机票了。”

“谢谢,”麦特说,“你知道,这对她不容易,特别当她刚才掉下去的时候。”

最搞笑的英文小笑话:一厢情愿的误会

At the supermarket I noticed an elderly man who seemed to be following me wherever I went. As I moved to each aisle, there he was, smiling at me. Now I was wondering if he was interested in me. At the dairy counter I was checking out the eggs when I felt a tap on my shoulder. Turning around, I saw that it was the same man. "Lady," he finally said, "you have my shopping cart."

在超市我注意到一位上了年纪的男子好像总在跟着我。我每到一个售货通道,他就跟我到一个售货通道,微笑地看着我。我开始想他是不是喜欢上我了。在乳品柜,我正给鸡蛋包装结账时,有人在我肩上轻拍了一下。我转过身发现还是那个男子。“女士,”他终于开口说话了,“你用着我的购物车呢。”

最搞笑的英文小笑话:Losing One Pound

I complimented one of my co-workers on having lost ten pounds. However, I couldn't resistbragging that when I was 17, 1 weighed 225 pounds and today I tip the scales at 224. 1 added, "That's not bad for a man of my age."

Overhearing this, a woman remarked, "You mean to say it took you all this time to lose onepound?"

我称赞我的一个同事减肥10磅。可是,我禁不住夸耀说我17岁时,体重225磅,而目前体重是224磅。我还说:“这对我这样年龄的男子来说,是不错的。”

一个女子听到了这些话,她说道:“你是说你花了这么长时间才减了1磅?”

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