初中英语笑话_经典英语笑话

2017-03-12

笑话是日常生活中人们消遣娱乐的一种常见语言现象,其目的在于在会话过程中传递和激发幽默感。小编分享初中经典英语笑话,希望可以帮助大家!

初中经典英语笑话:Five Hundred Times 五百遍

In the traffic court of a large mid-western city, a young lady was brought before the judge to answer a ticket given her for driving through a red light. She explained to his honor that she was a school teacher and requested an immediate disposal of her case in order that she might hasten on to her classes. A wild gleam came into the judge's eye. "You are a school teacher, eh?" said he. "Madam, I shall realize my lifelong ambition. Sit down at that table and write 'I went through a red light' five hundred times."

在中西部一个大城市的交通法庭里,一位年轻女士被带到法官面前,她由于开车闯红灯被开了罚单。女士向法官解释,她是一名学校老师,请求法官马上处理她的案子,以便可以赶回去上课。法官眼中闪过一丝狡黠,说道:“你是学校的老师,对吗?女士,我马上要实现我毕生的愿望了。在那张桌子旁坐下,写‘我开车闯了红灯’500遍。”

初中经典英语笑话:好消息&坏消息!

An artist asked the gallery owner if there had been any interest in his paintings currently on display. "I've got good news and bad news," the owner replied. "The good news is that a gentleman inquired about your work and wondered if it would appreciate in value after your death. When I told him it would, he bought all fifteen of your paintings."

"That's wonderful!" the artist exclaimed, "What's the bad news?". With concern, the gallery owner replied, "The guy was your doctor."

一名艺术家问画廊老板,最近有没有人对他展出的画感兴趣。“这有好消息和坏消息,”老板回答。“好消息是有一位先生咨询你的作品,他想知道在你死后你的画会不会升值。我告诉他你的画会升值,他就把你的15幅画全都买走了。”

“真是太好了”,艺术家是喜形于色,“那坏消息是什么?”带着关心的口吻,画廊老板回答,“买画的人是你的医生”。

初中经典英语笑话:I hung him up to dry 我把他吊起来让他晾干

Jim and Mary were both patients in a Mental Hospital. One day while they were walking by the hospital swimming pool, Jim suddenly jumped into the deep end. He sank to the bottom. Mary promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled Jim out.

When the medical director became aware of Mary's heroic act he immediately reviewed her file and called her into his office. "Mary, I have good news and bad news. The good news is you're being discharged because since you were able to jump in and save the life of another patient, I think you've regained your senses. The bad news is Jim, the patient you saved, hung himself with his bathrobe belt in the bathroom,he's dead."

Mary replied, "He didn't hang himself, I hung him up to dry."

Jim和Mary都是精神病院里的病人。一天,他们沿着医院的游泳池散步,Jim突然跳入泳池的深水区,他沉到了底部。Mary立刻跳下去救他,她潜到水底,把Jim拉了上来。

当院长听闻了Mary的英勇行为后,他立刻翻

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