如何提升自己的自信(双语)
摘要:自信是一种无形的东西,一个人的自信特质能看出一个人与别人大不一样,其差异会达到可怕的程度而且感觉到这个人身上的那种力量感。在你感到自己非常自信的时候,自己有一种无人能够阻挡的感觉,貌似自己走在面前这条畅通无阻的光明大道上。那么,如何提升自信呢?
Confidence. It's that intangible thing which makes the difference between feeling scared and feeling powerful. When you feel confident, you are unstoppable and it seems like your path is laid out clearly in front of you. When you lack confidence, however, you can feel afraid, and sometimes all you can see ahead is the possibility of failure.
自信。自信是一种无形的东西,一个人的自信特质能看出一个人与别人大不一样,其差异会达到可怕的程度而且感觉到这个人身上的那种力量感。在你感到自己非常自信的时候,自己有一种无人能够阻挡的感觉,貌似自己走在面前这条畅通无阻的光明大道上。但在你感到自己非常缺乏自信的时候,你自己会感觉好怕,而且自己抬头向前看时,有时候感觉只能看到失败。
At some stage in our lives almost all of us will need to conquer our lack of confidence. (I've certainly been there!) The question is, how do you do it?
在我们生活中的某些阶段几乎每个人都遇到过需要自己克服缺乏自信的这一困难。(我本可以做到!)问题在于你是如何做到的?
Oftentimes coaching and transformation can bring about an increased level of confidence. (One of the many great by-products of the process.) While this does not happen overnight and there is no magic pill, the following are some strategies I have found that work wonders when working with clients.
通常做教练当老师能增加自信。(自信就是在锻炼的过程中得以增强的。)但这不是一夜之间的蜕变,而且没有奇效药片,下列是在与客户合作时发现的一些奇迹性的战略方法。
1.Get out of your comfort zone.
走出你的舒适区。
When you do the things that you think you can't, your comfort zone will continue to expand. Even doing something seemingly small every day will lead you to something bigger. You will grow and will begin to feel unstoppable. Just take that first step.
在你认为自己无法做到这些事情的时候,你的舒适区会继续扩展。即使每天做一些小事情貌似也会逐渐做一些大事情。你会成长并会开始感觉自己势不可挡。关键在于要迈出这第一步。
2.Acknowledge your fears.
承认你的恐惧心理。
Fear is normal. The key is to not let it debilitate you. Recognizing your fears will not make them come true. It's best to acknowledge and address the fears rather than not face them. Write out what you are afraid of and what you will do to mitigate those fears.
害怕是正常现象。关键在于不要让恐惧影响到你。要意识到害怕并不解决问题。最好要正视自己的恐惧不要回避恐惧。把你的害怕担心之处写出来,并且把减轻恐惧心理的办法也要写出来。
3.Be yourself -- unapologetically.
做自己—无需有歉意。
Remember, you can't control others or what they think. Wayne Dyer believes that if you ask 30 people their opinions of you, you are likely to find you have 30 different reputations. Strive to observe and witness others' opinions, rather than being attached to them. Find a personal style that feels great to you. Dress well, in the clothing you feel is very you. Live your life the way you feel is right.
记住,你无法控制别人或控制别人的想法。要是你问30人的观点,很可能会有30种不同的看法。努力观察并见证别人的观点,而不是附和别人。发现一个人的性格很好很对你的心情。穿衣要讲究,穿衣讲究你会感觉自己很自信。你会感觉你在过着你想要的生活。
4.Let go of the idea of perfectionism.
不要追求完美主义。
Striving to be perfect can cause self-doubt (as well as "stuckness"). Give yourself permission to make mistakes. Not allowing yourself to make mistakes will halt your growth. Overthinking can do the same.
极力要求自己做到完美就会怀疑自己(也会给自己设“障碍”)。要允许自己犯错误,不允许自己犯错误就无法成长。过于多虑一样无法成长。
5.Keep reminders of your awesomeness.
提醒自己要敬重自己。
Jack Canfield says, "Self-acknowledgment and appreciation are what give you the insights and awareness to move forward toward higher goals and accomplishments." Make a list of the qualities that are fabulously YOU. Acknowledge your own achievements. Revisit this list when you feel down.
杰克•加菲尔德说,“自我欣赏和自我认知是推动你向前走向更高目标和取得更大成就所具备的洞察力和意识力。”列出一个让你自己都难以置信自身所具备的的性格特质清单。承认自己所取得的成就。在你感到失望的时候再重新审视这个列表。
6.Find what makes you feel confident -- physically.
去做让你自己有自信的事情—从身心上都会有自信的感觉。
I recently worked with a woman who said that she literally gets a physical feeling when she feels confident. (I agree; confidence is not just in the mind.) I asked her to pay attention to what she is doing when she feels that feeling, and do more of that. One thing she came up with was listening to a specific song in the car. When she listens to it she feels awesome. Simple.
最近,我在工作上与一位女性打交道,她说,在她感觉自己很自信的时候自己的身体都能感受到这股自信的力量。(我同意,不只是在思想上有自信。)我让她去注意自己对自己正在做的事情的感受,接着再多做一些这类事情。她想起了她在开车时听到的一首歌。在听这首歌的时候感觉很棒。很容易就能做到的。
7.Be mindful of your body language.
留心自己的身体语言。
This takes a level of self-awareness and presence. As I took dance classes throughout my childhood, I frequently heard the teacher announce, "Heads up and shoulders back! Stand up straight and tall!" Give it a shot. Walk and move with purpose. It makes a world of difference rather than walking slouched with our heads down, which makes us feel low and sends out a negative impression to the people around you. Watch for folded arms and slouched posture, and for fidgeting with your hands. Smile and make eye contact.
这需要一定程度的自我意识和自我存在。在我儿时上舞蹈课时,我经常听到老师:“注意头和肩膀!要站直了!“试一试按照这个姿势有意识地走动几步。与耷拉着脑袋走路的感觉真的大不一样,我们这样走路也给人一种消沉的感觉,而且你给周围的人留下消极的印象。注意不要合抱双臂、姿势懒散、不知道双手该放在哪里好,要面带微笑并做眼神交流。
8.Practice assertiveness.
锻炼自己自信起来
When you address your own needs, miracles happen. So ask for what you want. I dare you.
知道自己的需求,就会出现奇迹。所以,要问自己要什么。我向你保证这样做会很见效。
9.Think confidently.
要有自信的信心
Placing your focus on the worst possible outcome can cause you unnecessary anxiety, and stop you taking action. Use your energy to acknowledge that there are an endless number of outcomes. What you focus on expands. See the results you want and they are likely to happen.
把你的注意力放在最糟糕的结果上,你就会有焦虑,还会阻阻碍你行动起来。要用你的能量来承认最终会出现各种结果。你的关注点要放开些,很可能就会有看到你想要的结果。
10. Forgive yourself when you're beating yourself up, and remember that you can begin anew any day. Your past does not predict your future.
在你击败自己时要原谅自己,记住,你可以在任何一天重新开始。你的过去并不预测你的未来。
Implementing some of these items can help you overcome the limitations that a lack of confidence imposes on you, and guide you as you find the power within to start changing your world. Feeling more confident is one part of living a happier, more fulfilling life.
应用这其中的一些招数就可以帮助你克服缺乏自信这条强加给自己的限定条件,并引导从内在力量上开始改变你的世界。感觉自己更自信是你的生活更快乐更充实的一部分。
What have you found to be helpful when it comes to feeling awesome?
发现这些招数有很大的帮助作用时,难道你还愁自己不会感觉自己很棒吗?