简洁的英语笑话阅读_简短的英语笑话欣赏

笑话使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松。与此同时,笑话也是人们反对极权和专制制度的有力武器。小编整理了简短的英语笑话，欢迎阅读!

简短的英语笑话篇一

Down on the Farm

农场趣谈

The farmer was painting the inside of his outhouse

一位农夫正在漆他茅房内的墙壁，

when he slipped on the seat and fell into the hole beneath.

一不小心由所坐的椅子上滑了一跤，跌落到下面的茅坑内。

"Fire! Fire! Fire!" he yelled.

“失火了!失火了!失火了!”他叫道。

Shortly, the fire department arrived and one of the firemen leaned down and asked the farmer,

不久消防队赶来了，一位消防人员弯下身来问

"Where's the fire?"

“哪里失火了呢?”

"There ain't no fire," said the farmer,

“事实上并未失火，”农夫说，“但若是我喊“大便喔!大便喔!”

"but would you have come if I'd yelled,

"你们会赶来吗?"

" Shit! Shit! Shit ! ? "'

简短的英语笑话篇二

A Satisfied Gustomer

一位心满意足的客户

A rough looking fellow strolled into the bank and walked up to the teller.

有一位相貌粗鲁的家伙走进银行对柜台职员说:

"I wanna open a god-damned checking account. "

“我想开个你他妈的活期存款账户。”

"CertainLy, sir," replied the young lady, “but there's no need to use that kind of language."

“当然可以啦，先生，”年轻的小姐回答说，“但没有必要使用那种字眼。”

"Hey, get your ass in gear, will ya? I’m in a hurry. ',

“嘿，你他妈的能不能快一点吗?我在赶时间呢!”

"Sir, I’m not used to being spoken to in that way. "

“先生，我不习惯别人那样子对我说话。”

"I wanna open a fucking checking account, and I want to do it now, understand?"

“我要开一个x××的活期存款账户，而且要现在就办，懂了吗?”

"Sir, I'm going to get the manager," said the indignant young lady.

“先生，我去找经理来。”气愤的年轻小姐说着。

Soon she returned with the manager, a dignified white haired gentleman, who asked, "What seems to be the trouble, sir?"

不久她带了经理回来，那位满头白发、看起来很庄严的老先生问道：“先生，到底有什么问题吗? ’

“I just won $10,000,000 in the lottery, and I want to open a goddamn checking account. "

“我刚中彩券得了一千万美元，我想开个你他妈的活期存款账户。”

"I see," said the manager warmly. "And this bitch is giving you trouble?"

“我知道了，”经理说道，“而这个臭婊子在给您添麻烦，是吧?

简短的英语笑话篇三

We're in the Same Boat

同病相怜

The young man was terribly self-conscious because he had a wooden eye.

一位年轻人因为他有只木制的眼睛而感到非常自卑。

His friends would often invite him to dance parties,

他的朋友常会邀请他参加舞会，

but he could never work up the courage to ask a girl to dance.

但他从没能鼓起勇气邀请女孩子跳舞。

But then, one evening, he spotted a girl With a wooden leg sitting sadly by herself.

有一晚，他却不经意看见一位装了一只木制义肢的女孩独自伤心地坐在角落。

Apprehensively, he walked up to her and asked,

他很谨慎地走向她问道：

"Would you like to dance?"

“你要不要跳舞呀?”

"Would I? ! " she exclaimed.

“我要不要? ”她惊叫。

"Oh, yeah? Well, you've got a wooden leg!"

“哦，怎么了?你有一只木制的义肢 (而我有一只木制的假眼，咱们应是天生的一对嘛!)。”