关于初一幽默英语笑话

近些年,冷笑话作为一种特殊的幽默方式在互联网、电视节目、书籍杂志上广泛流传。小编分享关于初一幽默英语笑话，希望可以帮助大家!

关于初一幽默英语笑话：I Lost 我输了

It was at a five o’clock tea. A young man came to the hostess to apologize for his lateness.

“So good of you to come， Mr.Jones，and where is your brother?”

“You see we're very busy in the office and only one of us could come，so we tossed up for it.”

“How nice!And so original， too! And you won?”

“No，” said the young man absently，“I lost.”

五点钟，下午茶的时间，一个年轻人因为迟到向女主人致歉。

“您能来可真好，琼斯先生，您的兄弟在哪儿呢?”

“您知道我们在办公室里有非常忙，我们俩只能来一个，所以就掷币来决定由谁来。”

“太有意思了!还那么有独创性!那您赢了?”

“不，”年轻人心不在焉地说，“我输了。”

关于初一幽默英语笑话：外语的重要性

A cat and her four kittens ran into a large dog. When the kittens cowered, the cat let out a series of loud barks, scaring the dog away.

Turning to her kittens, the cat said, "You see how important it is to know a second language."

一天，一只猫妈妈领着4只小猫在路上走，却遇到了一只大狗。小猫们吓的蜷缩成了一团，这时猫妈妈吼出了一连串的汪汪声，大狗被吓跑了。猫妈妈转过身来对几个小猫说，“孩子们，看看掌握一门外语是多么的重要呀!”

关于初一幽默英语笑话：Headstone "Strange"的墓石

A lawyer named Strange was shopping for a tombstone. After he had made his selection, the stonecutter asked him what inscription he would like on it. "Here lies an honest man and a lawyer," responded the lawyer. "Sorry, but I can't do that," replied the stonecutter. "In this state, it's against the law to bury two people in the same grave. However, I could put ``here lies an honest lawyer" "But that won't let people know who it is" protested the lawyer. "Certainly will," retorted the stonecutter. "people will read it and exclaim, "That's Strange!"

一个姓Strange的律师去买墓碑。他选好了以后，石匠问他，要在墓碑上刻什么碑铭。律师回答：“这里长眠着一个诚实的人，一个律师。”“对不起，我办不到，”石匠说，“要是这样的话，违反了一个坟墓只能埋葬一个人的法律。不过，我会刻上：‘这里长眠着一位诚实的律师’。” 律师抗议：“但是那样人们就不知道这里埋葬的是谁啊!”“当然知道啦，”石匠反驳道，“人们看到会惊呼‘太奇怪了!’”

关于初一幽默英语笑话：The bear and the rabbit 熊和兔子

There once was a bear and a rabbit that hated each other. One day, they found a genie(神)in a lamp who said he would grant them each three wishes. The bear went first and he said,” I wish to be the only male bear in this forest." And he got his wish.

The rabbit said, "I want a motorcycle helmet.(摩托车安全帽)" And he got his wish.

The bear went up and said, "I wish to be the only male bear in the United States, and all the rest to be female." And he got his wish.

The rabbit said, "I wish I had a motorcycle to go with that helmet(头盔;钢盔;帽盔;安全帽)." And he got his wish.

The bear said, "I wish I was the only male bear in the world, and all the rest were females." And he got his wish.

It was the rabbit's turn, and he said, "I wish that bear was gay(男同性恋)."

关于初一幽默英语笑话：MOSES & JESUS 摩西和耶稣

A burglar breaks into a house. He sees a CD player that he wants so he takes it. Then he hears a voice "JESUS is watching you". He looks around with his flashlight wandering "What The HELL Was That?". He spots some $ on a table and takes it......Once again he hears a voice " JESUS is watching you". He hides in a corner trying to find where the voice came from. He spots a birdcage with a parrot in it! He goes over and asks " Was that your voice?". It said "YES". He then says "What's your name?". It says "MOSES". The burglar says " What kind of person names his bird moses??" The parrot replys "THE SAME PERSON THAT NAMES HIS Rottweiler "JESUS".

一个窃贼潜入一户人家。他看到一个喜欢的CD机，他赶紧拿了。就在这个时候他听到有人说：“耶稣正在看着你。”他照着手电看来看去，嘀咕着：“到底是什么人在说话?”这时，他看到桌子上有些钱，他又拿了。。。那声音又来了：“耶稣正在看着你。”他躲到一个角落，想找出是谁在说话。结果看到一只鹦鹉，于是他问鹦鹉：“是你在说话吗?”鹦鹉承认了。 小贼说：“你叫什么名字?”“摩西”。小贼说：“什么人给鸟取这种名字?”鹦鹉回答：“就是那个给他的罗威那犬取名为‘耶稣’的那个人啊。”