笑到肚子疼的英语笑话

2017-03-08

笑话,顾名思义,是一种通过幽默的文字或图示来达到令人会心一笑或捧腹大笑效果的文学形式。下面是小编带来的笑到肚子疼的英语笑话,欢迎阅读!

笑到肚子疼的英语笑话篇一

Seeking His Fortune 闯世界

A bright boy left his family, going to new York to seek his fortune. None of his family seemed to doubt that he would gain success and wealth.

Several months passed without a word from him. One cold winter afternoon his father received a note from him at last. It was scribbled1(潦草地书写) in pencil on a small piece of oldwrapping2 paper.

He wrote: "Pa, now I'm under the old bridge. Meet me tomorrow night and bring with you a blanket or a suit of clothes."

一个生机勃勃的少年离开家人,到纽约去闯世界。他的家人好像都很相信他会成功,获得财富。

几个月过去了,他却杳无音讯。一个严冬的下午他的父亲终于收到了他写的一个便条,是用铅笔潦草地写在一小片旧的包装纸上的。

他写的是:“爸爸,我现在就在那座旧桥下面,明天晚上来接我吧。要带一条毛毯或一套衣服来。”

笑到肚子疼的英语笑话篇二

A stingy traveler 节俭的旅行家

Once a traveler wanted to visit Springfield by train. He went up to a ticket window and said to theconductor1, "I want a ticket for Springfield."

"Which Springfield?" asked the conductor, "Springfield, Massachusetts; Springfield, Ohio; Springfield, Missouri; or Springfield, Illinois?" "Well, which is the cheapest?" asked the traveler.

有个旅行家想乘火车去游览斯普林菲尔德。他到一个售票窗口对售票员说:“我要一张去斯普林菲尔德的车票。”

“那个斯普林菲尔德呀?”售票员问道,“是马萨诸塞的,俄亥俄的,密苏里的还是伊利诺斯的?”旅行家说:“哦,哪里的最便宜呢?

笑到肚子疼的英语笑话篇三

An old couple 一对老夫妇

An old couple were very saving. As a result they had a beautifully furnished house. One day the old woman missed her husband. She called out: "Old man, where are you?"

"I'm in the parlor1 for a nap," replied the old man. the old woman was horrified2 to hear that. She cried: "What? On the sofa?" "No, I'm lying on the floor," replied the old man.

"Not on that grand carpet?" the old woman asked again anxiously. "No, I've rolled it up," said her husband.

有一对老夫妇非常节省,于是有了一栋设备很华丽的房子。有一天,老太婆没有看到她的丈夫,就大声喊他:“老头,你在哪里呀?”

老头回答说:“我在客厅里小睡一会儿。”老太婆震惊得大叫起来,说:“什么?是在沙发上睡吗?”

“不是,我是躺在地板上的,”老头回答说。老太婆又着急地问道:“不是躺在华丽的地毯上吧?”“不是的,我已经把它卷起来啦!”老头说。

笑到肚子疼的英语笑话篇四

It was made worse 弄巧成拙

A man went to London to visit a friend. He stayed far longer than was expected. A week passed, he still made no attempt to leave.

At last his friend gave him a gentle hint1: "Don't you think that your wife and children would miss you?" But beyond expectation the man's answer was: "Oh, thank you very much. It's most kind of you. I'll send for them."

有个人到伦敦去看望一个朋友。他逗留了很久,是他的朋友没有料到的。过了一个星期,他还没打算离去。

最后他的朋友很客气地暗示他说:“你不觉得你的妻子和孩子在家里会想念你吗?”不料这个人的回答是:“啊,非常感谢你。你真是太好心了,我就把他们叫来吧。”

笑到肚子疼的英语笑话篇五

A poor housekeeper 差劲的主妇

A woman was dissatisfied with her next-door neighbor. She told her friend that the neighbor was a poor housekeeper1, her house was not clean and her children were dirty. Then she complained that one was almost disgraced by living near such a neighbor.

"Just look," she said, "at those clothes and those sheets and pillow cases she has hung outside all with black streaks2(条痕) up and down."

Her friend stepped to the window, raised it and looked out. Then he said: "It seems the clothes are very clean. The streaks that you see are on your own window."

有个女人对他的隔壁邻居很不满意,跟她的朋友说这个邻居不是个好主妇,说她家里不干净,孩子们都脏。还抱怨说和这样的邻居住得这么近几乎是很不体面的。

她说:“你就看看吧,她挂在外面的那些衣服以及那些床单和枕头套,上上下下都有一些黑斑纹。”

她的朋友走到窗前去,推开窗子

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