英语笑话加翻译，英语幽默笑话带翻译
笑话是现代社会发展最快的一种口头文学体裁,它体现了某一民族行为中最深刻的和潜意识中的观点。下面是小编带来的英语幽默笑话带翻译，欢迎阅读!
英语幽默笑话带翻译篇一
个人理财(双语阅读)
A silvedess mon goes fast ihrough the market.
身上无钱，市场疾行
There once was a rich man who was near deeth. He wru very grieved because he had worked so hard for his numey. So he began to pray Lhat he rmght he ahle to take some of his weakh with him.
曾经有一个富人快要死了，他租伤心，因为为了钱他才拼命工作，他想把钱带着一起上天堂，因此他开始祈祷恳求他能随身带一些财产.
A:Sorry,but you car't take your wealth with you.
对不起.你不能带走财产。
B:Could you speakto Cod to see if he might hend the rules?
你跟上帝说说情吧，看能否网开一面?
(Then he continue to pray his wealth could follow him,and the angel reappears.)
他继续祈祷能带上财产，天使又出现了。
A:The Cod has decided to allow you to take one suitcase with yourself.
上帝允许你随身带一个手提箱。
(Overjoyed.the man gaLhers his largest suitcase and fills it,with pure gold bar s and places it beside his hed.Soon afterward the man dies and shows up at the Catea of Heaven to greet St.Peter. Peter sees the suit-case.
富人欣喜若狂，拿了他最大的手提箱，里面装满了金条，然后放在床边。不久这个富人死了，出现在天堂门口向圣彼得致意。圣棱得看到了那只手提箱。)
C:Hold on. you can't bnng thatin here!
放下，你不能把那东西带到这儿来。
B:But I have pennjssion and you can verify ny stcuy with the Lord.
但是我已经得到丁许可，你可以到上帝那儿证实一下。
C:You are rigt.You are allowed orie carry-on hag. Bm i'm supposed to check it's contents before letting through.
没错，你可以带一只手提箱，但我要检查一下里面是什么东西才能放行。
B：OK.
好的。
(Then he opens the suitcase to inspect the worldly items that the man found to precious to leave behind.
于是圣彼得打开手提箱检查那位富人舍不得留在尘世间的宝贝。)
C:You bought our pavement?!
你把我们这儿铺地砖带来了?!
英语幽默笑话带翻译篇二
八卦娱乐圈(双语阅读)
Be on your guard when people flatter you.
有人吹捧你的时候，千万要当心。
Harry saw an ad in a window.It said:"Wanted.The Beat Salesman in the World.Top pay." I'm a eTeat salesman. Harry told himself.I can sell anything. PIl go in and ask for Lhat job. He wem into Lhe build-ing and spoke ro the manager.
哈里在橱窗上看到一则广告。上面写着：“招聘世界上最好的售货员，报酬优厚。”我是一名了不起的售货员，哈里自言自语，任何东西我都能卖出去，我要进去应聘这份工作。他走进大楼去和经理说这件事。
A:I'm the besl salesman in the world.Give me the job.
我是世界上最好的售货员，把这份工作给我吧。
B:You must prove you're the best.
你必须证明你是最好的。
A:I'll pass every test you give me.
我会通过你给我的每一次考验的。
B:Good
好。
The manager took a box of candy out of his desk.
经理从桌子里取出一箱糖果。)
B:Last week,I bought a thousand boxes of this candy. If you can sell them all before the end of the week,you can have the job.
我上星期买了IOOO箱这种糖果。如果你能在周末之前把这些全卖出去，你就能得到这份工作。
A:That's easy.
这很简单。
( He took the hox of candy and left the office.Every day and all day.,he went from shop to shop, trying to sell boxes of the candy. He couldn't sell one. The can dy was so bad he couldn't even give it away.
他拿着这箱糖果离开了办公室。每天从早到晚，他从这家店走到那家店，竭力想卖出这1000箱糖果。结果他一箱也没卖出去。糖果质量太差，以至于送人都没人要。)
A: I'm sorry, sir, I was wrong about myself. I'm not the best salesman in the world, but I know who is.
很抱歉，先生，我搞错了。我不是世界上最好的售货员，但我知道谁是最好的。
B:Oh. Who?
哦，是谁?
A:The person who sold you a thousand boxes of this candy.
是把这1000箱糖果卖给你的人。
英语幽默笑话带翻译篇三
Curiosity killed a cat.
爱管闲事，自己吃亏。
Jack's father and the professor are talking about Jack.
杰克的爸爸正在和教授谈论杰克。
A:Why did you fail Jack in his examination, and tell him he would have to leave the university?
你为什么给杰克不及格并让他必须退学?
B:Because he really cannot continue his study in the univversity.
因为他确实不能在大学里继续他的学业了。
A:But he is a good boy. If you let him pass this time. I'm sure he will make a progress next year and pass the examinations at the end of it really well.
可他是一个好孩子。如果这次您能让他过关，明年他一定会大有长进，而且在年终的时候能够非常出色地通过考试。
B:No,too,that's quite impossible! Do you know, last monthI a sked him when Napoleon died, and he didn't know!
不，木行，那是根本不可能的，你知道不知道，上个月我问他拿破仑足什么时候去世的，可他居然会不知道。
A:Please sir,give him another chance. You see.Iam afraid w e don't take any newspapers in our house, so none of us even knew that Na- poleon was ill recently.
先生，请再给他一次机会吧。您要知道，恐怕是因为我们家里没有订报纸吧，所以我们全家甚至没有一人知道拿破仑最近得了病。